beloved ࿎ finn w

twenty

finn's pov:

i ran outside of aria's house. the house that smelled welcoming, smelled like apples, smelled like her. i hopped into my dad's car, getting ready to drive far away. driving on my own only made me more sad, i had just gotten my lisense and was about to tell her. until she broke my heart.

i tried to keep my eyes on the road, but i had to pull over to a parking lot. it wasn't safe to drive and think like i was. tears were falling.

along with the pieces of my heart.

it's safe to say that i was heartbroken. i haven't felt this way before. she made me feel like i never have, and it used to be a good thing, but now it's terrible. it's worse than it ever felt.

my dad didn't question me when i got home. if it were my mom, she would've asked too many questions. i couldn't handle any more questions. i just wanted answers.

how could she betray me? she wouldn't. at least i think.

my heart took over my head as i slammed the door to my room. i instantly went on every social media and blocked her. i tweeted a few things so my friends would understand not to bother me.

i stayed up watching american horror story. the first season, to be exact. the season aria and i were watching when i flipped out. the facetime replayed in my head.

"hey, noodle! what's up," she smiled. her face practically lit up.

"is finn there?"

of course i answered. what did he mean by not letting me know something. that they liked each other? that she loved him instead of me?

i felt dumb. i was crying in my bed watching netflix. as dumb as i felt, i related to tate. not in the murder-rape sense, but more as an i-gave-her-everything-and-she-said-go-away sense. tate left violet alone, he'd wait for her. he'd let his heart break for her.

too late for that. my heart already broke. what's left is on her floor. i'm not waiting for her.

i fell asleep staring at my ceiling. not crying, but it hurt to swallow. i lost the one person i loved. the one person i wanted to be with.

i blamed this all on myself. i should've asked her about this instead of yelling at her. aria wouldn't go behind my back. wyatt couldn't do that. he wanted to ask someone out!

i fell asleep, hoping that my dream was more peaceful than reality.

it was peaceful.

but it wasn't reality.

——

"finnie!" aria shouted, her adorable laugh coming from nearby.

"sweet pea! over here!" i shouted, waving my hand for her to see.

we were at a pink diner. a diner that aria's mom brought her to when she first arrived. it was special to her, and now it was special to me too. she slid into the seat happily.

"i'm so excited," she said giddily.

"for the food or me?" i grinned.

"food. do you even know me?" she laughed. i smiled. her laugh could light up a whole city.

——

i loved her.

i woke up smiling. i shook the smile off, or it ran away itself. reality came back, like a brick. all i wanted to run to her and tell her i was sorry and that i missed her, but i didn't.