Timmy left last night, or this morning rather, around three. I didn’t realize how much I had missed him. It’s summer break right now so when I walked into my room and clicked the lamp on I knew I wasn’t going to sleep anytime soon. I had simple things I needed to do and most of them involved keeping my mind of Timmy, Shain, Aiden, Alex, Tucker Ann, and anyone else who invaded my thoughts. There was a bed to be made, laundry to organize, laundry to put away, laundry to be washed, a floor that needed to be vacuumed, dishes that could be washed, TV shows to watch on Netflix, and possibly reading to be caught up on.
I went downstairs and into the laundry room to start gathering clothes for me to put away. While I was in my room and going back and forth to my room and the laundry room.
Before Timmy had arrived last night I placed my phone on the counter in the bathroom. So between one of my trips back and forth I decided to go check my phone. Aiden had called four times. Maybe he got the hint that I didn’t want to talk to him. I hope he did. I thought I could walk away from the phone and be okay but I didn’t. The boy on the other end of that phone helped me through many nights. The ones when Timmy or Shain made me mad and the ones when I couldn’t get through what Timmy or Shain had done to me. Most of those nights were the ones where Timmy or Shain had done something and I over thought whatever had happened. Honestly you think being friends with mostly boys is great, it is, but you get more attached to them than the girls. So when they do something that you get upset over it’s worse. The girls you definitely get close to but not the same way.
I wiped the tears off my face that had fallen down and put another load into the washer and dryer. This was going to be the last load because I had nothing left to wash. I ended up cleaning the kitchen and mopping it while waiting for the clothes. I ventured into the living room and folded some blankets back up. I walked back upstairs and took the old sheets off my bed so I could replace them with new ones.
It all seemed so peaceful for so long. Nothing too painful would happen. I didn’t have to walk around being numb anymore. That was a blessing in itself. Now I have to say to myself, “tomorrow you’ll be okay. It’ll hurt less than it did yesterday.”. I didn’t ever realize that I would be heart broken if Aiden and I broke up. Honestly I never thought we would break up. I mean I guess it was always an option just not one I had thought of.
Instead of sitting her dwelling on what happened alone I wrote a note and left it on the counter. I called Shain and told him I needed some company. Even though it was about seven in the morning and I was completely exhausted but I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep anytime soon.
As soon as Shain opened the door I hugged him. I am almost a hundred percent positive that his shirt got drenched on the shoulder. He didn’t even ask any questions he just picked me up and carried me to the kitchen. He set me down on the counter without saying a word. He walked away from me only to get a rag and run warm water over it. The only thing he said was, “here let me clean up your face.” He spoke in the gentle manner that I had only had him use with me a few times.
When I was able to breathe almost normally again he asked me what happened. I didn’t want to go into a long explanation for fear that Shain would have to fix up the rag again. “It’s over.” I only said two words. He looked at me and cocked his head to the side, “what is?” I just gave him a dull look. His mouth formed and ‘o’ because he knew exactly what I was talking about.
I stayed at Shain’s house that day. He let me borrow one of his t-shirts and layed there with me. His sheets were soft, they smelt like him, and he was warm. I curled up against him and had my head on his chest the whole time. I don’t know if he ever moved.
I woke up later that afternoon and was cold, Shain was gone, the sheets had been tucked around me. I walked out into his living room and found Timmy.
“Where’d Shain go?”
He turned around and raised an eyebrow, “question is why are you here?”
I went to sit down in the recliner. “Timmy, I’m sorry about what happened with Melody and Daesi.”
He made a face. “Nah I haven’t worried about them for awhile. You were right about them the whole time but I was listening to something other than my brain. I should have listened to you.”
I thought about what he had said for a few minutes. I never thought about it that way. I didn’t give him my opinion. Well I didn’t until they did certain things. Timmy got mad and wanted to start stuff that didn’t need to be started. So we took a break for a little bit.
