Once In A Lifetime One Shots

Green Light (Diary Entry #9)

Where do I start?

I've been MIA (Missing in action) with writing Diary Of A Thespian. Don't worry, it will be finished. It's just that there's a lot of things I need to do before I can finish it. I'm hoping I can finish it by June. I've been letting life take me to places I've been familiar with and it's this place called past.

Don't worry, I'm not haunted by it. These couple of months, ever since the new year began, I've been feeling the passion grow stronger then on occasions, it would lessen until it reaches another high.

I'm not complaining, I don't know what to exactly feel at the moment so I'll just list these thoughts and emotions down.

1. I need to finish my first big project for my music career, it's going to make me happy. It's something I don't talk about because I want it to be successful. Who knew I'd be in this stage, trying to outdo my previous works. By outdo I meant create new sounds no one's ever heard of.

Why am I doing this? To launch VERSUS to SUPERSTARDOM.

2. I'm also an actor for a Filipino adaptation of Annie. I'm making the music but at the same time, I'm memorizing the script.

3. Been busy taking photos. Before I forget, this is the blood moon. I took this pic last night, sorry if it's kinda blurry, night mode is blurry.

4. Still banging my head to Melodrama by Lorde and holy fuck, Green Light is just beautiful, even if I repeatedly played it for 10 months straight. It's my go to song. My favorite album for life (next to my own ones of course).

5. I don't feel horny anymore. Guess I'm too busy.

6. I don't want to lose my emotions.

7. I am sick and tired of being lost, I've found myself again.

8. I feel apathetic towards my age group or even the ones ranging from 25-35, it feels as if they also don't know shit about being alone, being independent, and being an individual who is creative in this "hard knock life", excuse my Annie pun.

9. Watched a set of plays earlier, I liked the play titled "Exit" even though I couldn't relate. Here was the review of the play I hated because right there and then, I knew the director and the playwright were edgy, pretentious try hards. They try so hard to be "hip" and "sensual" but ugh, here's my review:

"If she is an activist, how can she afford to order at a coffee shop? Also, aren't activists against commercialism? Yet she watches a film that is commercial bullshit.

Also, awkward acting from the actors but they managed to pull the energy. This play is another propaganda to lead people into false activism. She's always screaming "ipaglaban!" when it's nothing new. The play needs to perfectly blend light romcom and it's thrilling tone.

It hasn't blended well but I guess it must be the fact that they are newbie actors. This play is catered for the romantic Filipinos who never uses their brain into doing anything productive but rather revel with the blissful ignorance of fantasy dates."

I said all of those because activists here in my country aren't exactly known to be fond of westerners, let alone the western culture. I respect their beliefs and virtues but sometimes, they're too fucking much. They're too righteous and closed minded to the point that they've become what they hate, soldiers.

No more individuality, just a bunch of humans trying to not fit in. Fucking shit.

10. I feel everything and it's wonderful.

11. I've missed my friends that I haven't talked to in a while @JaneyJordan @cara-tesora-mia

12. Yes, I'm fucking cynical. I'm proud of it. I don't feel romance anymore because it's plain stupid. Only thing I feel is love, not romance. My love for myself, what I am doing and what I am capable of.

13. I know who my husband will be (full name, nationality, religion etc.) but I just don't give a shit about the pain I'm going through because I'm waiting for him. He's my Green Light.

Yes, it is painful that he doesn't know me but who cares? I'll be known by the entire Milky Way Galaxy.

I'm working on myself and it feels amazing!

I love you all my amazing readers!

See you until next time! P.s, fuck all of you young people who are still idealistic. Not everything will bow down to you nor everything that you fantasize will happen. You have to work for it, start a path, be your own hero!

Don't wait for anyone to save you! Don't believe the false empowerment and equality this society tells you. Don't ride the bandwagons of misogyny, misandry, false feminism, "meninism", LGBTQ+ asshats and more.

Go be fucking offended, life was meant to hurt you. Just promise me one thing, you'll learn from it and become strong!

Love,
VERSUS

This is a pic I took earlier