Disney Got It Wrong

War of the Idioms

"War of the Idioms"—Posted by Belle Tynan to Mom Said A No-No

Life as a single parent can sometimes get a little overwhelming. You're one person doing double duty in everything. Even the smallest tasks require a level of skill and finesse to encompass both sides of the parental spectrum. You have to find a balance in trying to be both mom and dad at the same time, and you often have to try to find ways to fake it when you come up short.

Take potty training as an example. It seemed like it would be simple enough starting out. Show your kid how to get on the potty and do their business, and be diligent about taking them to the bathroom at regular intervals. Sounds easy, right? And it's really not all that bad as a parent dealing with a child of the same gender. But being a single mom trying to teach a little boy how it all works was sometimes a little chaotic.

How was I supposed to show my son how to whip it out and aim that thing when I lack the equipment to properly demonstrate? And I wasn't about to buy one of those things on the internet that's supposed to help me fake it. That's just too much uncomfortable weirdness that promised to confuse the hell out of my son and traumatize the both of us.

But thanks to my brothers who my son adores and looks up to as important male figures in his life, he eventually got the idea behind standing to go after just a couple of visits and my youngest brother insisting that no nephew of his was going to sit to pee. Of course, then there was the issue of my son dropping his drawers in the back yard to pee in the sand pit, and let's not forget the occasional wet toilet seat or the increase in the amount of bathroom cleaner I started going through to battle the urine smell, but at least we made it past him peeing in his pants or through the crack between the toilet bowl rim and the seat. Progress is progress. I'll take it.

I will say this: I never thought something like 'pee or get off the pot' would become a frequently spoken part of my everyday vernacular, and I'm not just talking about saying it to my kids. I have to remind myself often that I have an important job to do with these kids. I have things to teach them, important values that they should learn to live by that society seems to be falling short of.

In a world ruled by social media and public image, it seems like we're looking for each other to drop the ball at every turn. People are too worried about what the next person is doing, what other people say or think about them, and trying to live up to someone else's expectations of perfection instead of focusing on their own progress and personal growth and what makes them happy. We're giving up our individuality to try to conform to an image of perceived perfection, and that's not the example we should be setting for our kids.

We need to be raising strong independent people who are confident in who they are and eager to lift each other up and rejoice in their successes instead of looking for ways to tear them down. We need to show them that it doesn't matter what Frank on Facebook said about your profile picture or what Sherry on Snapchat was or wasn't wearing in her latest snap. What matters is what they contribute to the world and what kind of influence they make. What will be their mark? What kind of impression will they leave behind when they walk out of the room?

It all begins with us, the parents. Sure, we're gonna mess it up sometimes, and it's just as important that they see our faults because it reminds us and teaches them that we're all only human. It's okay to make mistakes. But if they see us fail they should also see us dust ourselves off and get back in the saddle. And when something happens that forces us to throw in the towel, that had better be one dirty little raggedy ass towel by the time we're done with it. Pull your socks up and get cracking, because we're raising the future of society here, people.

Whether you're cooking up something for an end of the year bake sale for your daughter's school or putting together the big presentation that'll hopefully get you that promotion you've been busting ass for, the goal should always be to go big or go home. Your kids are your legacy, and they learn from your example. They're watching every little move you make, and they're counting on you to get it right.

When facing this beautifully chaotic and sometimes straight up hellish thing called life, you gotta piss or get off the pot. No pressure, right?