🌼Imagine one of your junior high classmates has gone missing for 3 days. But you, and your buddies, know exactly where to find the body. Join Annie Belcastro, Gordie Lachance, Chris Chambers, Teddy Duchamp, and Vern Tessio, as they set out to find...
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"Hey Gordie." I asked excitedly. "Why don't you tell us one of your stories?"
A couple of hours after stopping at the church, we all decided to settle down for the night in a little pocket of the forest. Everybody sat and roasted the hamburger meat Teddy and I picked up earlier, while drinking their Coca-Colas and talking about different things. Everybody had some good laughs while the sun set low on the horizon, setting the mood for us all to wind down.
"I dunno..." Gordie said, unsure of himself. He looked down awkwardly. "I don't really...."
"Oh, come on!" Chris pleaded, leaning forward. "You know we love hearing them!"
"Well, I guess so." Gordie said. "The one that I've been thinking of is kinda different though.... It's about this kid named Davie Hogan, but everybody calls him Lardass."
"Lardass?" Vern questioned as the fire crackled and glowed golden on his face.
"Yeah. Lardass. And he's really fat you know, but it's not his fault... It's his glands."
Vern chimed, getting ready to launch into a story. "I have a cousin like that, Sincerely! She's a whale! No shit-"
"Would you shut up?" Teddy snapped.
Vern sat back, defeated, and told Gordie to go on for the last time.
Gordie proceeded to tell us about Davy Hogan (Lardass), and how he wanted to get revenge on all of his bullies. Including one of the guys who was entered in the contest with him. So, at a pie eating contest, he drank a full jar of castor oil and ate a whole raw egg.
After eating about five pies, he threw up all over the jerk guy that was sitting next to him, and it escalated into a giant barf-o-Rama including the crowd and all contestants.
"Oh, man. That was the best, Just the best." Chris mused, extinguishing his cigarette in the dirt.
"Yeah, Gordo. You should get that published!" I complimented. "In a magazine or something, for sure."
Gordie smiled, thanking me sheepishly. Although, Gordie's little bashful phase didn't last for long, after Teddy ruined it.
"What happened next?" Teddy asked.
Gordie's face contorted into confusion."What do you mean?"
"I mean.." Teddy rolled his eyes."'What happened?'"
"Uh, that's the ending, Teddy." Gordie said obviously.
Teddy's face fell in disappointment. "That ending sucks!"
"Use your imagination." I said, making my hands form a half circle, mimicking a rainbow.
