my eyes flutter open to see white ceiling above me, a ceiling I know to well. I turn my head to see my psychologist, Janice, staring at me with a intense look and her legs crossed. I've know her since I first started on Victorious, when Dan found out about my "problems" he hired her to stay on set in case there was ever an emergency, which I hate, I don't want anyone to have to give me special treatment of any sort.
"Hello Ariana" she says with a a slight smile
"What happened?" I ask with a groggy voice
"You had a severe panic attack, again"
I pull myself up into a straight position on the chair with the little energy I have left in my body
"Have you been taking your medicine?"
"Of course" I nod my head
"What do you think triggered the attack?" She asks, her eyes still fixed on me
"I don't know" My head falls to my hands and I can feel myself about to burst into tears, I feel so helpless, I can't even control these stupid attacks and they're coming more and more often, almost like before when-
"Ariana?" Janice's voice breaks my thoughts and I look up at her "are you okay"
I nod again "just fine" I respond 'fine' I hate that word, whoever says that is never truly 'fine'
Then it gets silent for a moment "Can I see your wrists?" Janice speaks up
"Jan, I'm okay, you don't need to look at my wr-"
"Let me see your wrists" she interrupts me and holds her hand out
I sighs and pull my arm up onto my lap, I release the clatch on my special chanel bracelet a fan gave me and set it next to my leg, then a whole bunch of random ones I throw on in the morning, just so no one sees.....my arm lays on my leg, every scar I've ever gave myself exposed, making me feel naked and vulnerable. I shutter remembering almost every single time I caused one of theses scars. Janice extends her arm out longer which takes my eyes away from my arm, and I bring ny arm to hers, she grabs it and I can see a sad look in her eyes. It quickly goes away, I guess being in her business she learns to hold in her emotions, no matter how much she tells her patience not to.
"I told you, I haven't done it in four years"
"Well we have to make sure it never comes to that again, so I think tha-" I roll my eyes and they fall on the clock
"Shi-" I begin but cut myself off as I jump up
"Ariana, what at you doing?!"
"I'm really sorry, but I'm late for the studio" I look around anxiously for my purse and see it on the table, thank God for whoever put it there.
"Sit back down this instant!" Janice raises her voice
"I'm sorry, but Scooter and Leon is waiting for me at the studio!" I grab my purse and make sure my phones in there then stuff my bracelets in it so I can put them on in the cab, and run to the door
"ARIANA GET BACK HERE!" Janice jumps up from her seat
"Call me and we can reschedule for another time, bye, love you" I quickly shout out to her and run down the hall with my newly dyed hair flying behind me
YOU ARE READING
Unfixable
Fanfictioneveryone thinks Ariana's life is perfect, but they have no idea....Ariana's life, hard work and everything she has ever know starts shattering around her piece by piece, breaking her apart slowly and painfully. but this time maybe even beyond repair...
