The Professor

Chapter Forty-Two

Dean's hard expression softens instantly once he sees me. He pulls me gently into his apartment and it's there where I finally break. I put my face in my hands and start to sob as Dean places his hands on my arms and tries to pry my hands away from my face gently.

"Claire, what's the matter?" he asks softly.

I continue to sob and shake my head. I texted him on my way over that it was an emergency i'd explain in person. He never responded and I didn't care. Obviously he was waiting on me with how fast he opened the door.

"You have to talk to me," he says, still trying to pull my hands apart.

I let him this time. I know the rest of my half-worn-off makeup from last night is now running down my face and my hair is a mess but I don't care. Dean's looking at me with worried eyes and I finally recognize the smell of eggs and bacon. It makes me gag.

I instantly bolt away from where i'm standing in the kitchen and run to his bathroom in the bedroom. I throw myself on the floor and vomit into the toilet. Dean walks in immediately and starts to pull my hair away from my face. That's two men seeing me throw up in less than twenty-four hours.

I stop vomiting and sink back on my thighs. Embarrassment is not even phasing me at the moment.

I take a deep breath and try to stand up. Dean assists me by wrapping his arm around me gently and then wetting a rag under cool water. He leads me to his bed and helps me climb onto the mattress and then presses the rag to my forehead. I close my eyes and sink into the mattress and coolness of the rag. I'm hungry from all the emptying i've done in the last eight or more hours.

I finally open my eyes and look to Dean. He's looking me with concern and I finally decide to tell him.

"Dean..." I start, my voice already breaking from the tears swelling in my eyes again. "I think I might be pregnant."

His eyes widen in an instant and he remains quiet.

"I've been throwing up since last night and all this morning. I just got sick because I smelled what you cooked for breakfast."

He's still quiet.

I watch him and note how he hasn't blinked since I told him. He looks frozen. His hand is still connected to the rag on my head and his eyes are still staring at me with full intensity as they were a few seconds ago. I don't know what to make of this.

"Say something, please. I'm freaking out," I say.

"Have you taken a test?" he asks immediately.

I shake my head. "No, not yet."

Dean leaves the rag on my head and hops out of the bed. He walks to his closet to put on some jeans and a clean shirt before rubbing on his deodorant and grabbing his wallet from the dresser.

"Where are you going?" I ask frantic.

"To the store to get a test. Don't leave. Keep the rag on your head."

"What if I get sick again?" I ask, looking at his white sheets.

Dean grabs the waste basket beside the dresser and places it next to me on the bed. 

"I'll be back soon."

I think Dean just made record time with the fastest store tip. He's back within a matter of minutes and wastes no time opening the test.

"How are you back so early?" I ask him.

"There's a drug store right beside this place. It's never came in handy until now."

Dean helps me out of bed and leads me to the bathroom. He sets the box on the counter and the fidgets around. He runs his hands through his thick hair and I can tell he's nervous. Hell, i'm nervous.

We're both silent as we stand in the bathroom. I can tell he's hesitant just like I am, we both aren't ready for this. 

Dean looks to me and I look back at him. 

"I can't take this with you in here," I say.

He nods his head.

"Oh, yeah, i'll just, um... be outside when you're done."

He shuts the door behind him, leaving me alone. I stare at the test on the counter. I'm not ready for this...

My hands are shaking as I remove the contents from the box and then read the instructions on the back. My stomach feels sick and my body is shaking as my nerves are at an all time high. 

Here goes nothing...

I take the test and then start a timer for five minutes. While the timer is running, I sit against the wall on the ground and think. What am I going to tell my parents? What is Dean going to do? HOW AM I GOING TO EXPLAIN THIS?

I try to picture me with a baby bump and then in the hospital with a newborn wrapped in my arms. I see Dean there, smiling, happy to be a dad. He's leaning over the hospital bed beside me and we're staring at our baby. It's a happy picture, one I know is not going to be real if this happens.

The timer goes off and it causes me to jump. I remain seated on the ground and try to force myself off the floor. My anxiety is through the roof right now.

I grab the test and walk out of the bathroom. The bedroom is empty and I walk into the kitchen. I see Dean sitting on the couch in the living room with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. I take a few steps closer to him and his head shoots up when he hears me. He looks really worried.

"Well?" he asks.

I shrug my shoulders. "I haven't looked yet," I sit on the spot beside him. "I'm really scared," I finish.

Dean takes a deep breath. "So am I."

"I want to look but I don't at the same time."

"We'll look together," he offers.

I nod my head and go to turn the side with the result over but then I stop.

"Wait," I say. "What are we going to do if it's..."

"If it's positive?" he finishes. 

I nod my head, a silent tear escaping. Dean rubs it away with his thumb and sighs.

"Let's just see what it says first," he says. "On the count of three. One, two... three."

I flip it over.

My eyes scan the white oval with the results.

I can't believe.

I cover my mouth and start to cry.

Two pink lines.

I'm pregnant.