An American In London: S4

7. Bullet Wounds

(Taehyung POV)

Aiden gently pushes up his thick brown glasses with the plastic rims that were far too oversized for his petite facial structure as he sits down next to me on the grand staircase of the Grayson mansion, with our tiny newborn in his arms. 

Careful not to stir little Mahina from her precious slumber, He shifts her from one arm to the other before I snake my noninjured arm around him. 

Aiden had been awfully quiet these past few days, and it was all my fault. I was never one to deny my wrongdoing, but this seemed different. He slowly lifts his head and I didn't have to trace his stone cold gaze to know he was looking at my arm. 

At least I was still intact, unlike poor Jamie, but the injury could not be hidden. Therefore I was forced to face the ugly truth. 

"Tae-ah," He sighs under his breath. I slowly rub small circles into his aching back with the palm of my hand. 

"I know," I try to tread lightly but squeezes his eyes shut in response. 

"You could have died...again," He says with such a high quantity of spite, I felt like I had been stabbed in the heart. He wasn't going to lecture me, but our daughter was something else. 

I wish I could reach out and caress her chubby little cheeks our pet her small tuft of jet black hair. But with one arm currently incapacitated, these wishes would continue to be just that. 

"But I'm not dead, slightly injured but it could have been worse," I try to lighten the conversation but his beautiful light brown eyes only narrow in an angered response. 

"Do you think that makes this any better? Sure, Jamie got his arm cut off, but I don't care about Jamie. He's not the father of my newborn child, you are. You are Taehyung Jin. So don't pull that one with me." He says with such feeling, I instantly knew that this is what he had been holding in for days. 

He suddenly shifts away from me and I look around to see my family had started to gather around. 

"Why don't we talk somewhere else?" I suggest and he gives me a small nod to show he agrees.

With Mahina passed off to my little sister Clara, Aiden and I stood on the secluded second-floor balcony. I anxiously itch my arm inside the sling, knowing what I had to do. What I had to promise to him.

 The topic I had been tiptoeing my way around and avoiding like the plague was about to smack me in the face.

 "I know you've been upset since it happened but you need to talk to me. You can't keep all this anger boiled up inside." I offer as he paces the length of the balcony before coming back to me. Tired from the side effects of the pain medication, I lean back against the railing, waiting for him to compile his thoughts. 

"I'm not mad." Aiden lies as he comes close to me, He was trying to stand up to me, but thankfully he's not very intimidating considering he's a foot shorter and just reaches my shoulder. 

"We're beyond mad now. I'm just so pissed off that you would think it's okay to fight when our daughter just came home,"

"It was an emergency,"

"I DON'T CARE!"

"There's no need to yell,"

"Sometimes you're so hard headed I feel like nothing gets through,"

"That's unfair, you're acting like I don't see your point,"

"Clearly you don't,"

"Aiden, I was wrong. I should never have left. But this was a different kind of emergency,"

His look of disgust stops me from continuing my defense as the tears line his lower eyelids.

"Taehyung, you do understand that you were THIS CLOSE."

He holds his thumb and forefinger just a millimeter apart for extra emphases before continuing.

"This close to dying. That pole was this close to the left side of your chest and if it had pierced your heart, your spine, your arteries, you would not be standing here today. But this not only involves you. Because I could have also been this close to becoming a widow. This close to losing my soulmate and only partner in life." He spits out and suddenly burst out in anger, with his fist jetting out and clipping my injured shoulder as the tears stream down his face. 

A wave of pain from my shoulder washes over me and I double over, feeling like I was going to be sick from both the pain and the guilt.

"OUR DAUGHTER COULD HAVE GROWN UP WITHOUT EVER KNOWING HER FATHER. MAHINA'S ONLY MEMORY OF YOU COULD HAVE BEEN SEEING HER FATHER DEAD IN A FUCKING CASKET. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT!" He screams at me for the first time since our fight France before he was kidnapped. His pain was my pain and the combination hurt more than my shoulder ever could. 

I regain my standing and forcefully grab my husband with one arm. He tries to fight me, kicking and yelling to let him go but thankfully I was still stronger than him with one arm. I could feel his tears wetting my button-down shirt as he broke down, finally giving in as I held him in my arms as close as physically possible. 

"I don't want to be a single father like my dad! I don't...I can't do this without you!" He cries into my chest and I can only close my eyes and listen to him sob. 

Sorry wasn't enough for the scare I cause or the risk I took, I not only disappointed him as a husband but I had already failed as a father within my daughter's first few days of life. 

"Aiden, I promise this will never happen again. You'll never feel this way again. And you are never going to be left to raise our little Mahina alone...I'm retiring from NG," As soon as I say it his tense composition softens as if his fragile body had filled with a sudden relief. 

"Tae-ah, I know it's a big part of who you are...maybe just take a break," Aiden hiccups as he wipes his tears with his sleeve. I gently bring my hand up his back until it just rests under his chin, gently caressing his wet cheek with my thumb in small circles. 

"No, I'm never going to leave you and Mahina again, you two will always come first in my life and I'm not going to let you down again."