Starvation is a funny thing, why would you do it to yourself? Josh told me I was fine but I was dying, he didn't listen. He only focussed on how slim I was. I only focussed on how nice he was. But he wasn't. And the thing is, I wasn't able to kill him because I loved him too much. He brings around whores and thots but by the next day, I'm his little slut. And I accept it, as long as he shows me even a little bit of attention.
So how does this story end? It actually ended a while ago, with my mom dying. No one ever saw it coming, just like me. My sister blocks everything out and goes to clubs to get drunk and have a "good" night. My dad is slowly killing himself with alcohol. Who's fault is it? Mine, I wasn't able to hold them together. And Josh... you were the antagonist. I still write him notes but their always so small, like I don't even like writing them.
Every day I promise to leave but he's so divine that I can't seem to get away for more than a few hours. He makes me feel alive, it's a shame he had to end it so early for me. When our bodies collide, now that's the best part. The stuff your parents are all "hush hush" about. The things you swore you would never do when you used to play tag on the playground. 'I shall marry a prince, and then, I'll decide whether to share my virginity with him.' I remember saying. Too bad I died before I could do anything.
One day things crumble, they start to fall apart. My world blurs and I start to wonder if I'm descending into heaven. Josh starts freaking out. "It's happening, I thought I had at least another month or two." He shakes and shivers with fear. I've never seen this side of him... I've never seen this whole persona of him. "Don't forget me, promise you'll come back, take some pills I don't care just come back." He grabs ahold of my trying to speak to me. Things start to feel heavier but the air feels more clear. Things come into focus again. Instead of an old house, I'm in a hospital bed. I look over and see Josh, sleeping in a chair.
I try to speak but nothing comes out.
End.
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Small Nøtes {Jøsh Dun X Reader}
Fanfiction(Y/n) has a journal that she writes in every day about personal things. Actually, she wrote in it every day... until her mother's death. Devasted, (Y/n) stops going to school which means that she could fail. Josh tries to help her out but she now ha...
