Last Bandit: Book 1 in The Bandits Series

Sleazy Come, Easy Go

Chapter 15: Sleazy Come, Easy Go ~

I purchased The London Quireboys first record today. And there's a song called Sweet Mary Ann on it. I wish she could hear it.

Living on a musty couch in my brother's basement really isn't that bad. But Roxie and Jasper have been begging me to move back in with them. I've only been out of their apartment for two weeks. I think when it's just the two of them, things get heated. When another person is there, they keep their arguing to a minimal.

My new roommates are very kind. I suppose they have to be because my brother pays most of the rent. He tells me he has a lot of help from his girlfriend, Athena, but Russell and Nick and Nick's occasional girlfriend, Bunny, don't contribute much at all. I wonder why he still allows them to stay here. I'll pitch in as much as I can for everything while I live here, just to help Davey out.

Athena is a very pretty girl with very long blonde hair, sun kissed skin, and big hazel eyes. She's a dancer. A stripper, really, but I've learned they like to be called dancers. She performs at the Seventh Veil on the Strip, the same place Motley Crue shot their video for Girls, Girls, Girls. She wasn't in the video, but she knows Sharise Neil, Vince Neil's wife who was featured in the video and works at the strip club.

Since I have been living with them, Athena has made us all dinner every night before she has gone to work, which must be very rare for her because Nick and Russell are surprised every time they see a set table and food in the oven. They make fun of her for catering to the 'guest', which is me. But she says I deserve a nice meal. She looks at me with the same sympathetic expression so many others seem to look at me with. I'm just fine. Why doesn't anybody see that?

Bunny, on the other hand, drinks a whole lot and forgets about everything. She's a dancer also, and a good friend of Athena's. But I've noticed the two of them are very different, not just in the way they look, but in the way they act. Athena is gentle, while Bunny is very wild. And that just about sums them up as a whole person.

My brother has told me that he had a good band going for about three years a while back. But it fell through when his drummer jumped off a third story balcony and broke his leg. Turmoil struck within the band, and he told me the long story short is that they all hate each other now.

Nick and Russell have their own band called Blue Cocaine. I asked Davey why he's not a part of their group, and he said it's because they just don't sound quite like he wants his band to sound. Luckily, my brother and I have a very similar taste in music. In fact, he's surprised I even know who The Dogs D'Amour are.

Alexandra was smart, too, when she recruited Brian and Rex. The two of them share similar music likes as my brother and I. Brian even confessed as being a huge fan of The Faces and Rod Stewart, which in my opinion, is great. But I suppose some people make fun of him for it.

She has stopped by twice this week to see how things have been going. She's like a manager type of thing for us, but doesn't book shows or promotions. Well, at least not yet. Davey told me she has a knack for getting the word out for bands. She's good at it. And she's supposedly really creative and makes rad flyers.

I've been tossing around a band name for the past few days. I told Mary Ann that I like the word 'moonbeam', and now I'm just trying to figure out how that would work with a rock n' roll band.

The Moonbeams. Johnny and the Moonbeams. Davey and the Moonbeams. Red Light Moonbeams. Moonbeam. Moonbeam Fire. There's really endless combinations I can put together that contain 'moonbeam'. But perhaps I've got to give it up. It doesn't seem to work with anything.

I decide to forget about band names for a while and turn to the most recent letter from Mary Ann. I read it once more just for the hell of it.

May 9, 1990

Dear Johnny,

Happy birthday! This probably won't arrive there until a few days before you turn 23. So have a good day, eat cake, and be happy.

Nothing's really new here. Same old, same old. I'm still getting looked down upon by everybody, and there's not a day that goes by when I don't get bullied by kids at school.

I went to the doctor's recently, though, and he told me I'm healthy. I hope I am. I hope you're healthy too.

As usual, I hope you're having a good time. I hope you're reading these letters, whether they mean something to you or not anymore.

L.A. Guns is my favorite band now that I listen to them every night. My parents still haven't found out about what I do when I vanish into the basement. In fact, they don't care what I do anymore. I bet if I pulled the tape player upstairs and blasted Cocked and Loaded, my parents would just glare at me with hatred in their eyes. I still love Styper very much too, but L.A. Guns is very sleazy, just like you said. If you weighed sleaze and religion, Johnny, what do you think would weigh the most?

I guess I should tell you that my parents don't like you anymore. They hate your guts.

But I still love you. I don't think I'll ever stop loving you.

And Johnny, I think this will be the last letter I write to you. Don't take it the wrong way. I just have to sort things out.

I'll talk to you again soon.

~ Mary Ann

I don't want to stop getting her letters. I don't want to stop seeing her swift, precise handwriting. So I write back this time, making sure to point out the return address. And just like last time, I make it short and sweet.

Dear Mary Ann,

I've got a band now. My brother is the singer. We have been reconnected by accident. But it was a very good accident, ya know?

Thank you for the birthday wishes. I'm also living here with my brother, so you should now send your letters to the address on the return label.

I'm very glad you are healthy, but very sad that you are not doing well otherwise. I don't quite understand why people would want to hurt a girl like you. I wish I could help you. I really do. I'd beat up those bullies, sock your dad in the eye and slam a bible against your mother's head if I could.

L.A. Guns is one of my favorite bands. Sleaze is always better.

I'm sorry I don't write a lot anymore. And hey, it's probably best your folks hate me.

But please don't stop writing. Seeing you written in words keeps me going. Your letters are something to look forward to.

I love you too. Dearly.

~ Johnny

I take a sip of whiskey and fold up my letter. The abundance of booze in this house is going to kill me.