saints and soldiers » klance

20: (BONUS) The Only Exception

And up until now
I had sworn to myself that I'm content
With loneliness

Shiro pushed out of his crowded lecture hall and into the cool air ahead of the rest of his class, sucking in a deep breath. It had been stifling in there, the professor's voice too harsh and the air too hot, too thick.

Leaves had started to fall off the trees, turning the ground to a patchwork of concrete gray and grass green and gold and red and brown. It was Shiro's favorite time of year. It always had been, but especially since this year- this year, when instead of curling up alone he huddled close with Matt on the couch, where instead of buying coffee and attempting to bake for himself he was constantly batting Pidge's hands away from misshapen cookies and too-large lattes.

He smiled to himself as he speed-walked away from the NYU building, already thinking about seeing them after he got home.

His class had gotten out at three, so Shiro managed to avoid the lunch rush and the after-work rush on the way back to his apartment. Matt and Pidge both had school today too, but Matt was over at Columbia and it would take him a lot longer than Shiro to get back to his place.

The Holts, Shiro had been told, had encouraged Matt to go to Oxford. They didn't live in the city- Matt had his own apartment and Pidge lived with him- so Shiro had never met them. He knew, though, that they were supportive, that when Pidge had asked to come with Matt they hadn't batted an eye, that Matt had come out to them at thirteen they had accepted it completely. He knew that they were smart, like their kids; he knew that they were the kind of loving family he had always looked up to.

He also knew, though, that they had tried to talk Matt out of attending Columbia.

Matt had gotten into every single college he had applied to- every Ivy League, Oxford, UCL, the world's best universities had all eagerly accepted. Matt's test scores were unheard of, and his extracurriculars- unbelievable.

Matt had settled, for reasons even Shiro hadn't been informed of, on Columbia, and absolutely could not be dissuaded.

Shiro knew that Matt had told Pidge- the two of them shared just about everything- but Shiro had never asked. Never look a gift horse in the mouth, Shiro's grandfather had always said- and he lived by that, at least in this. Matt and Pidge... they were the best thing in his life. Shiro didn't care what had brought them there- he was just glad it had.

Strange though it may sound, Shiro had never been more thankful for anything in his life than the Holt siblings nearly getting hit by a bus.

For most of the year before he had met them, Shiro had been alone, and he had found that he actually didn't mind it. It was easier that way, really, or at least so he had told himself- no one depending on him, all the space he could ever want or need, independence, learning to be self-sufficient, and, best yet, no one to hurt or be hurt by at the slip of the tongue or loose lips.

He had never let himself think the word "lonely."

And then, in the blink of an eye, the Holts waltzed into his life, hyper and ridiculously smart and caffeine-addicted and unpredictable and random and a little crazy and incredible.

Starvation for friendship and human contact had hit him like a brick to the face- a much-needed brick. Looking back, he couldn't believe his own denseness, his own ability to overlook something that was blaring in his face just by virtue of sheer stubbornness. It still amazed him a little.

The second he got home he turned on Pandora (Pidge's favorite station, because that would make Pidge happy and Matt was happy when his sister was happy) and started brewing pumpkin spice coffee, because it was Matt's favorite this time of year (Pidge loved it because her brother loved it even though her preference was plain black) and pulled out a box of gingersnaps and a carton of fresh strawberries to accommodate snack necessities (both of them ate like linebackers, despite being small). He stepped back to admire his handiwork, inhaling the smell of coffee beans and pumpkin spice and cookies, and smiled. It was simple, but it was just enough.