No More No More

Hopedale

I choked on the last part.  A sob overtook me so my words weren't as strong as I would've liked them to be.  Nonetheless, they seemed effective enough so I slammed the door shut and raced down the stairs.  I started the car and proceeded to speed off to wherever I was going.  I wasn't sure as to where yet, but I'd find out once I got there.

--

As they say, all roads lead to home.  Or is it Rome?  Well, I'm certainly not in Rome.

        "Mom," I sobbed, standing limply in the doorway.

     My mother immediately held me tightly, shutting the door behind me and leading me to the kitchen table.  She sat me down after deciding that her embrace was long enough, and turned on the stove to make some tea.

        I sat in silence, sniffling.  When my mother sat down across from me with my tea and her coffee, she looked at me expectantly.

     "You only come here when you're upset, honey," she said, trying not to sound like she was complaining.  I shrug.  "Why're you upset?"

        I shrug again.  I'm not sure why I'm so upset.  It didn't concern me in any way until I invited Julia to stay with us.  And big deal that I did!  Like, so what that she's there?

        My mother studied my face, something she seemed to do whenever I didn't speak.  She lightly touches my left cheek, looking worried.  "What happened?" she asked.  I look at her quizzically.  "Your face is all red.  Only this side, though."

        How is it still red?  True, the second time did hurt... A lot actually... But I didn't think the mark would last this long.

        "Did... Did someone... Hit you?" she asked, clearly hoping I'd say no.  I nod.  Then we play twenty questions.  I say twenty questions because I only nod or shake my head in response to my mother's persistent questioning.  "So you'll be staying here for awhile then I take it?" my mother asked finally.  I nod.  "That's perfectly fine, sweetie."  She kissed the top of my head and cleared away the mugs.  Mine was still full; I hadn't touched it.

        I looked at my reflection in the mirror as I was getting ready for bed.  My face was tear-stained, the left side slowly fading back to it's normal color.  You could hardly see the remains of Steven's hand print.  I still have trouble believing he actually hit me.

        I curled up alone in my bed, replaying the day's events and allowing a few silent tears to fall.  Okay, so maybe I'm not completely over Steven...

        I wonder what the rest of the guys are doing, Julia too.  Particularly Joe.  I wonder if Steven left too.  I wonder if they're back yet; if Joe wonders where I am; if Steven's sorry.

--

After that, Aerosmith went back on tour.  Julia found out, after going to the hospital, that she was nearly two months pregnant.  Steven was apparently being tolerant of her living in the apartment, and the rest of the guys were helping her out as best as they could.  The baby was said to be due in February, towards the end.  The boys, except Steven, had a bet going on whether it would be a boy or girl.  Julia didn't want to know.

        I found all of this out over the phone at night, talking to Joe.  He begged me to come back up, but I said I just couldn't.  He couldn't come down because they were too busy getting ready to go back on tour.  It had been arranged so that once they left I would go back up to the apartment and take care of things.  I hadn't seen or heard from Steven since the night, and I didn't plan to.  I never want to see him again; I never want to speak to him again.