Group Therapy

Part 2

Joker: What a nap!

Black Mask: Well we're all glad you had your beauty sleep but whatever you know, you better start talkin'.

Joker: I know a lot of things. But I also don't know anything. I might know some things. But if I did, why would I tell you? You just want the big scoop?! Maybe I should've joined your little Girl Scout troop. You always liked eating with rats. Hehe.

Freeze: This would be easier if he was still sleeping.

Riddler: Hey, I never banged on the glass. Perhaps this is the fate you spoke of priorly.

Joker: One worse than death, I'm sure.

Joker is now sitting up with a sickening grin on his face. The room is fully awake. Bane clears his throat and everyone looks in his direction.

Bane: Forget the purple pendejo. What were we doing before we woke up here? There may be something we are missing. Starting with Riddler.

Riddler: Well I was simply decoding the notes left by the zodiac killer and forming a superior system of coding using a base forming algorithm and well, look at me rambling on. Now that the Bat is gone I can finally work on my tech and my riddles in peace. I'm drawing a blank on where my day went after all that. Oh well, here we are.

Joker: My turn! So there I was, minding my own business, swimming in the depths of despair.

Black Mask: Oh right, we killed your boyfriend.

Joker: Ha! A friend, no doubt. I've forgiven you all for your horrific actions. I'm not some sentimental fluff ball. I'm sure I'll cross your paths eventually. That'll really be a hoot.

Bane: Joker you will continue.

Joker: So as I was saying I was minding my own business, depths of despair, yadda yadda, kicking around a can down by the docks. I only had two grenades, so I was saving them for a stray dog or something stupid like that. The wind was cold on my face. I took a deep breath to inhale all of the pollution and sea-simmered stench. Then I was warm all of a sudden. It was quite a rush. How about you, popsicle pants?

Freeze: I was trying to track the weather patterns for.. research. I've been working on something meticulously for the last few months. I bent forward to adjust the numbers and I blacked out. Whoever tracked us down had muscle. This suit isn't lightweight material.

Riddler: Perhaps karma exists after all. Could Gordon have a rogue crew? Has Nightwing returned from the depths? Red Hood's been missing for years. Barbara was working at a shelter last time I saw her.

Joker chuckles.

Joker: Meals on wheels.

Riddler: Red Robin retired and little Robin is in a coma. Also, no one else is looking to thwart Gotham's underground whether it be criminal or vigilante. The only one who could pull this off, seemingly, is the clown.

Joker: I'm always the bad guy. Even in a room full of bad guys! I don't think one lousy man pulled this off, do you? Even I've employed a few mindless meat sacks to do the heavy lifting.

Bane: As loco as the clown is, he holds seeds of truth. We cannot jump to conclusions. For the record, I was preparing a bath when I went blank. My new formula strengthens the durability of my skin, it is also very relaxing.

Black Mask: I was enjoying a fine glass of aged Stella Black with the fire going. My girl brought me my cigars and went to the kitchen. She screamed, I turned around, then I got cheap shotted. By who or what, I got no clue. Next thing I know I'm here with you bozos.

Joker: Only one bozo here, Rommy. And he's not dressed like a clown.

Black Mask: Uh oh, someone's still upset we clipped his butt buddy, isn't he?

Joker: Listen here, you one-trick phony. Any spoiled brat with money can put on a dark mask and punch stuff. But there's a fine line between nemesis and pussy with a pocket square.

Black Mask: You know it's a real good thing this glass is here or I-

Black Mask is interrupted by a loudspeaker that squeaks and pops into fruition. The prisoners go silent, eager to know what's next. A man's voice begins to speak. He is unknown.

Therapist: Good evening, gentlemen. I'd like to welcome you all to the last therapy session you'll ever need. You can refer to me as The Therapist.

Joker: Ugh, these never work.

Freeze: Doctor to doctor, I suspect you're barking up the wrong tree.

Therapist: Oh no I'm barking up the right tree. The right tree, indeed. I suppose by now you've been keen enough to realize that your attempts to escape have been rendered useless.

Riddler: That was like, the first thing I realized. Secondly, I'm just flabbergasted as to why you've turned us all into zoo animals.

Joker: Oh can I be the hyena?

Bane: Quiet, puto.

Therapist: You all have a deeper purpose. Something you've greatly overlooked. You've all had one bad day.

Freeze: Where have I heard that before? One bad day.

Riddler: Thus, the pendulum swings and cuts deeper into the clown.

Bane: I thought we agreed no jumping to conclusions.

Riddler: I haven't. But the most possible outcome lies within probability. There's only one person here that doesn't quite fit the metaphorical bill. And when you factor in possibly the largest indicator..

Freeze: Which is?

Riddler: You will always find me in the past. I can be created in the present, but the future can never taint me. What am I?

Bane: History.

Joker chuckles as everyone turns to face him. He looks up and his smile sluggishly drops into a frown.

Joker: Oh c'mon this is so not my style. I'm stuck in here just like you! Besides, do you really think I wouldn't kill Nygma immediately?

Therapist: No one in this room is solely responsible for your predicaments. Everyone here is responsible for where they are in one way or another. You've all done things that have led you here. My goal is to have you feeling better in the end.

Black Mask: I feel great. I was living comfortably before you ended my vacation, asshole.

Mr. Freeze: Your vacation is but a delusion. We are all slaves to this city, and we are all slaves to time.

Bane: Well our time may be running out. Let's just play this stupid game.

Joker: This should be fun. What's the policy on cheating? Would I be disqualified?

Therapist: This is no game. This is group therapy. The only person you can cheat is yourself. Just pretend you're never leaving here. And no judgement necessary. Let's begin.

The room gets even brighter and the prisoners brace themselves for their "session".