It's Always Been Him (BTS Jungkook x Reader)

10

In my music lesson the next day, Maya told me about the rumours going around. I told her I knew, since Yeseul had confronted me about it, and she agreed with me about her being a bitch. She asked what I was going to do about it, but before I could reply, Jungkook took his seat next to me. He rummaged through his bag, pulling out his work. I had a quick skim over it before he caught me, and saw it was coming along really well. Better than mine, I thought.

He kept going through his bag until eventually shoving it on the floor and tapping Namjoon on the back. He turned around, and Jungkook asked for a pencil. But Namjoon only had one. He looked around a bit, but decided not to ask anyone else. Had he though, they would've gladly given him one. Maybe two, or three. Probably their entire pencil case.

I rolled my eyes and got my pencil. I only had one, but I had a few coloured pencils. I held it out to him, and he looked at me, dead in the eye. He had purple bags under his eyes and they were mildly bloodshot. What the hell?

He took it from me and let out a soft 'thank you', before continuing on with his work. I put my hand on his arm gently and he froze. He didn't pull away but I could tell he was thinking about it. I spoke in a low tone, hoping no one else would really hear.

"What's wrong?" He shook me off and continued with his music. I huffed and stuck my hand up. The teacher asked me what I needed. "Sorry miss, can Jungkook and I go to our Head of Year please? He wanted to see us quickly about an interview or something." She nodded nonchalantly and waved us out. Everyone looked at us weirdly, and considering I was practically dragging Jungkook out, it didn't make it look that much better.

Once we were out of the classroom, he pulled away. "What?" I bit my lip and took him by the wrist, pulling him along again.

"Walk with me for a bit." He looked back at the classroom door, and for a minute I thought he was going to go back, but he fell into step at my side. I stuffed my hands into my jacket pocket, his in his jeans.

"Why did you lie?" I scoffed.

"I would've thought you'd be leaping at the chance to skip class." He shrugged. He didn't have his mask with him, so I could appreciate all of his face. He really was quite handsome.

It was silent for a while, and once we got to outside the languages block, I spoke. "Are you going to tell me what's up? You may not want to, but it's clearly affecting you. Your bags are huge, and your eyes are bloodshot. You're not cocky, or trying to seduce anyone or get into their pants. You don't tease me or make fun of me for fucking things up. You haven't even talked to me for weeks." He stopped and looked down. I stood in front of him and pulled his chin up, making him look at me.

"Why do you care?" He mumbled, looking down again. I pulled his chin up and stared at him.

"Because I haven't got my music buddy anymore. You were a dick, sure, but that was you. Where'd you go?" I spoke softly with him. He shrugged. "Stop shrugging. It's annoying." A ghost of a smile flashed on his lips before disappearing just as quickly. I leaned against the wall. "Talk to me."

"It's just something at home. It doesn't matter." I'd never seen him like this. Ever. It wasn't like him, and I was actually getting worried.

"It does. You're not you anymore, Jungkook. What happened?" He fell silent. "Come on."

He spoke so suddenly yet so tiredly. "My brother's in a coma. He was in a car crash." My hands dropped to my side and my eyes went wide. Oh my god.

Before I knew what I was doing, I embraced him. I reached just above his shoulder, so I didn't hesitate to rest my head on it. He went stiff, but after a few seconds he hugged me back. I didn't know how long to hold the hug for, but judging by how his shoulders started shaking, I guessed he was crying. He buried his face into my shoulder, trying not to make a sound.

I hugged him tighter.

Sure, I didn't really like him - I think.. - and sure I didn't really care about him - I think.. - but he was making me really worried, and I wouldn't have even guessed that he was going through something so big. I'd never seen him cry; I never thought I would. And it wasn't a time where I could tease him, laugh at him because he was being a baby. I wanted to make him feel better.

Luckily there was no one around to witness his breakdown, my comforting. No one to spread rumours.

But part of me wished those rumours had been true.

I felt his tears go through my thin jacket and blouse, wetting my shoulder. But I didn't care. I didn't care if it would be awkward after this, if he would block me out of his life for fear I would judge him. I didn't care if he ignored me for the rest of the year out of embarrassment, or pretended like I didn't exist. I just wanted to hug him and comfort him and make him feel safer,  better.

I knew I couldn't do it - he wouldn't think I even cared. But I was going to try anyway. He didn't- no one- deserved to go through something like that alone.

I didn't know if his friends knew. They probably did, they were closer than family, as I said. But I didn't care. I knew, and I was trying to help him right now. That was what mattered.

After a while he calmed down and I pulled away slowly. I let my arms rest around his waist though, not willing to pull them away yet. He wiped his eyes, face red and blotchy. I was the ugliest crier, but no one should realistically look that okay when crying. He did though. He looked cute and soft. I mentally groaned at myself.

He started apologising, going to walk away, but I kept him there by his waist. It was a weirdly intimate moment, but I could tell that neither of us felt particularly uncomfortable. He sniffed, unwilling to meet my gaze. I chuckled a little, giving him another short hug. I let my arms fall to my side this time.

"Don't feel embarrassed." He scoffed, smiling a little. "I know we're not friends, since you're a dickhead and I'm.. also a dickhead.." I grinned. "But as long as you don't tell people I'm actually suuuuper nice, then you can talk to me about anything, anytime. If you wanted to." He smiled, genuinely. He looked like a cute bunny. I gazed at him.

"And why would I want to talk to you?" He playfully mocked me, and I rolled my eyes, grinning. There he was - that was the Jungkook I knew, I liked.. I think. "Thank you." I shrugged.

"You owe me a crying sesh, though. Okay?" I rubbed his arm comfortingly and went to walk back to class. It would be over soon. But he grabbed me by my small waist and pulled me into him. He leaned down before I could protest-

-And kissed me.

~~

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- Aly x