Super Rebels: A Star Wars Rebels/Super Mario Crossover

7: Bad Guys, Jedis, and Storytime

"Oi," Kanan said, sitting up. Hera was walking all over the room, wobbling with every step. "What are you doing?" asked Kanan. "Trying to get better," Hera replied. E.Gadd was sitting in time-out. He had been that way for two hours. Luigi had tried to feed him a meiloorun, but E.Gadd wouldn't eat it. Thus, the sickening silence was always being interrupted by E.Gadd's stomach rumbling in a healthy way. Hera tripped and fell. But, of course, she had been walking on beds, so the fall wasn't concerning or serious or even worth paying attention to. But it did bounce a bunch of Toads into the air, who still continued their stomach-rub act. "Oi," Hera said and laid back down in bed.
The afternoon was boring. E.Gadd was constantly sitting in time-out, except for when he asked to use the bathroom. But nobody let him out, because they thought he was lying. And he was.

In the Inquisitor's headquarters...

The Inquisitor was eating supper. Once he finished, he went over to his bed and laid down. Agent Kallus was standing around, watching him. "You can get out of my room now!" the Inquisitor yelled at him. "Oh, right, okay," Agent Kallus said and walked out of his room. "Oi," The Inquisitor said and closed his eyes. He had been sleeping for about two minutes when he shot up. He looked at his doorway and saw an army of white, round creatures with curved eyebrows, black eyes, and giant mouths and fangs and tongues that just hung out of their mouths. The Inquisitor stared at them weirdly. In the middle of them all was an especially big one, wearing a purple-jeweled  crown. "Uh, hi," the biggest Boo said. "I'm King Boo and I'm hunting some people. Is this Lothal?" he asked the Inquisitor. "Yes...yes, it is," the Inquisitor said, kind of stammering for words. "Great!" King Boo said. He turned around to all of his Boos. They had 2DS's at the ready. "Locate the folks! Find where they are! Find who they're with! Find EVERYTHING!" he yelled, waving his stubby arms in the air. The Boos tapped away. King Boo turned back to the Inquisitor. He studied him. "You appear to have been sleeping. Sorry to wake you," King Boo said. "Uh, it's okay, I guess," The Inquisitor replied. He was about to ask where they had come from when the Boo spoke. "Say, you kind of look like an evil person," King Boo inquired. "Um, well, I'm a dark side user," The Inquisitor replied, rather proud-sounding. "Oookay, whatever that means," King Boo said. "Hey!" a Boo piped up. "What?" King Boo asked. "It appears the fiends are at a hotel in Capital City," the Boo said. "It isn't far from here. Just for easy indentification, they're with some strange people... there are three humans, one Twi'lek, one Lasat, and one droid...whatever that means," the Boo said. "Room 28."
The Inquisitor could barely believe his stubs! He stood up. "I think they're with the exact crew of rebels I've been hunting lately!" he said to King Boo. "Oh, really?" King Boo replied. "Do you have experience with this crew?"
  "They're a difficult bunch," he said evasively. "But...maybe you and I could make an...alliance and we'd all get what we want!" the Inquisitor could barely believe he'd suggested it. "We might have skills useful to each other."
  "I don't know..." King Boo said. "What do we do, Boos? Should we join this dude?" he asked. The Boos all looked up from their gadgets. The Inquisitor stood there, feeling weird. A cricket was on the floor, chirping. "Sure, why not," said a Boo, without really making it a question. "Okay then, it's decided," King Boo said and shook stub-and-hand with the Inquisitor. "We'll team up to capture our crews together. But NOBODY is mooching off my hard work!" King Boo told the Inquisitor. "Let's go!" the Inquisitor said, proudly and happily and determined and evilly.

It was evening. Kanan was walking around. "I think I'm better at last!" he reported to Hera, who was sitting on their bed reading some book. "Great, I think we all are," she replied. Ezra was running around chasing Zeb, who was screaming and smiling at the same time. Eventually, Zeb stopped, and Ezra collided into him. "Oof," Ezra said, after he got up. "Ha," Zeb said. Sabine was washing paint off her hands in the now – fixed sink. Mario, Luigi and Peach were now playing Super Smash Crew, and the rest were amazed at how good they were at it. "Watch out, bro," Mario said, bumping Luigi playfully. "Aw, no fair!" Luigi said. Peach giggled.
  Kanan was sitting on the bed. He pulled out a bottle of something and his lightsaber and starting polishing it. He was just about to turn it on for an awesome test when a red lightsaber blade suddenly stabbed through the door. Toads started shrieking.
  Hera slammed down her book. She stamped right over to the door and opened it as if someone had simply knocked. "Aaahh!" the Inquisitor screamed in her face. "Oh, it's only you," he said when he saw her and raised his lightsabers. In an instant, Hera punched him and he fell to the ground.
  "Oh wells," King Boo said, who was beside the Inquisitor. "I guess it's up to me now!" he floated through Hera and appeared in the room. Twenty thousand Toads started screaming and running all over the room. Kanan ignited his lightsaber and slung at King Boo. King Boo deflected it with a beam from his crown. "I give up," Kanan said. He deactivated his lightsaber and sat on his bed. King Boo shrugged his body. That's when he saw E.Gadd in time-out. He burst out laughing in his intimidating way. "Ha ha! E.Gadd, ha, is in, ha, time-out!" King Boo said in between gales of laughter. E.Gadd fumed up so much his glasses fogged. Then he got up, went over to King Boo, and said, "You should fear me, Boo scum." Kanan looked at E.Gadd awkwardly. Luigi looked at Mario and nodded. They both jumped on King Boo in an ambush attack. King Boo angrily swirled everywhere, trying to grab them, but his arms were impossibly short. Clinging on, Mario reached into his pocket and pulled out a beam sword. Luigi did the same. In unison, they ignited them and attempted to plunge the blades into King Boo. But at that very moment, King Boo vanished and they fell to the floor. In an instant, all was quiet.
  "What, are those," Kanan said, staring at the bros' weapons. Luigi looked at his beam sword proudly. "Beam sword," he said, beaming. He deactivated it and held it out to Kanan.
  In build, the hilt was metal and similar to a lightsaber. The blade, while it appeared to be made of the same energy, seemed to change colors as it was used. It was also a bit thicker and more scythe-shaped. Kanan could only wonder at the weapon from another dimension. "These are your weapons?" Mario and Luigi nodded. Ezra looked surprised. But there wasn't time to argue about laser swords. Kanan stood up and turned his lightsaber on. Mario and Luigi stared in surprise, but they didn't say anything.
"We need to get back to the Ghost," Kanan said. "Let's go," Hera said, getting up. "Also," Kanan added, "Nice punch."
"Oh yes, that was my signature punch," Hera said proudly.
"I could tell," Kanan replied.
"Can we PLEASE stop talking about punches and go?" asked Sabine.
  "Oh, right," Kanan said and stepped out the doorway. But he met face-to-face with the Inquisitor. "Yi!" Kanan said and jumped into Hera's arms. Hera put Kanan down. "It's just the Inquisitor, Kanan," she said matter-of-factly. "Oh, right," Kanan said. He darted past the Inquisitor. "Wait!" the Inquisitor yelled. He was about to run after Kanan and Hera and Sabine and everyone else that ran past him, but an agonizing wave of Toads knocked him over when they swarmed past his feet. "Curse you stupid mushrooms!" the Inquisitor yelled. King Boo appeared next to him. "Kissing the ground, huh?" King Boo said. The Inquisitor groaned. King Boo heaved him up with his body. "You know, they're getting away," he said. The Inquisitor stood up, and put a determined look on his face. Then he sprinted down the hallway, closely followed by King Boo.
The crew was running toward the Ghost. "Kanan! We still have to pay! That Twi'lek needs it!" Hera yelled as she ran. "We don't have time for that!" Kanan yelled back. Hera pulled some money out of her pocket and threw it at the door. At that very moment, King Boo and the Inquisitor came float-running out the door. The money pelted the Inquisitor. "Aieeee!" the Inquisitor yelled and fell to the ground. "Oiiiiii!" King Boo yelled and stopped so the Inquisitor could get up. By the time they were running again, everyone had boarded the Ghost. "Great! This is totally your fault!" King Boo yelled at the Inquisitor. "Ugh, let's just go get my fighter," the Inquisitor said. They walked to a bay nearby where they piled into a TIE fighter with curved wings. The Inquisitor got behind the controls. "Hey, wait, I think I should fly, because you ruin everything," King Boo said. "You don't know how to fly," The Inquisitor said and stuck out his tongue at King Boo. King Boo's tongue was always sticking out so he didn't do anything in response. Then he rammed the Inquisitor out of his seat and grabbed the controls and took off, which sent the Inquisitor flying every which way. "I don't care! Besides, I play King Boo Kart!" King Boo cackled and sent their fighter sailing into the sky in chase of the Ghost.
Back on the Ghost, Hera stepped deeply on the gas pedal. Kanan sat at the ready behind the passenger controls. Sabine was at the main laser cannons. A dozen Toads were trying to climb up after her, but because they were so big and clogging, none of them made it. Ezra was running all over the ship, screaming. He ran into the bathroom. Zeb was sitting in a steaming bath with cucumbers on his eyes. "AAAAAHHHHH!" shrieked Ezra. Zeb shrieked too, upon hearing Ezra so close that he was predictably in the bathroom. His cucumbers flew off. "GET OUT!" Zeb screamed. Ezra tripped and fell, and then he managed to scoot out. "Wait a minute...Zeb doesn't take baths!" Ezra said to himself. Suddenly, the ship did a loop and Zeb went flying into the hall from the bathtub. "Oh well," Zeb said. He pulled out a bucket of mud and dumped it on himelf. Then he licked himself until he looked natural, but smelled stinky. Sabine was blasting away. Kanan and Hera were flying like a duet, dodging blasts from the Inquisitor's TIE, which was in close pursuit. "This is tough," Kanan said. "Yeah," agreed Hera. Ezra came running into the room. "That weird guy and the Inquisitor are chasing us!" he yelled in Hera's ear. "Ouch, Ezra, you are freakishly loud," Hera said. Ezra was about to scream something else when Hera jerked the ship and Ezra flew across the cockpit and landed on Kanan, who quickly shoved him off and veered the ship up, sending Ezra flying through the door, only stopping when he hit the ladder leading up to the guns. A bunch of Toads fell off the ladder and plummeted down the hallway. "Oops," Ezra said.
Back in the Inquisitor's TIE, King Boo was swerving the ship everywhere, as the Inquisitor went flying around. It wasn't long before the Inquisitor finally grabbed the back of King Boo's seat, covered in bruises (but they were barely visible because of the Inquisitor's dark skin). "I told you that you were terrible at flying!" the Inquisitor yelled. "Oh, I'm just doing that for FUN!" King Boo shrieked and flipped their TIE upside down. The Inquisitor flew up and hit his head on the roof. Pretty soon he was standing on it. He looked up at King Boo sitting upside down on the floor, flying. "They just blasted away really fast," King Boo reported. "We'll never catch them now." The Inquisitor slapped his face. "They went into hyperspace, dummy," he said. "Let's land back on Lothal and try to figure out our next move."
  King Boo sighed. "We both would be doomed a lot less if you would quit being an oaf," he said. The Inquisitor looked at the wall stupidly. King Boo swerved the ship around and crashed them into the ground. "Great, you don't know how to land," The Inquisitor said. King Boo stuck out his tongue as far as it could go. The Inquisitor opened up the hatch and cold wind blasted his face so much that it turned red. He hopped out. King Boo followed. "Look at all this damage," the Inquisitor said, examining his TIE. "Now I'll have to spend centuries getting it repaired."
  King Boo rolled his pupils. "What exactly are we going to do now?" he asked. The Inquisitor shrugged. "I guess first, we'll just watch some podracing," he said. He led King Boo to a fancy room on a parked Star Destroyer. He clicked on the TV. A bunch of Imperial guys were shooting at each other in pods. "Let's watch," the Inquisitor said. "Okay," King Boo replied and floated on the couch. "Oh yeah, this is the end of the season we're watching," the Inquisitor said and zipped his lip. King Boo couldn't zip his lip. After a while, the Inquisitor got up and made them some sodas. King Boo eagerly sucked up his. Finally, the podrace ended. The Inquisitor started screaming and jumping and yelling. He shook his beer everywhere, spraying things with it. A couple Imperial dudes came in to see what the commotion was, and the Inquisitor killed them on accident with an ottoman he had picked up and was throwing around. King Boo was laughing and roaring in his Boo way. Once they had calmed down, the Inquisitor said, "Let's go find our crews now."

  "So you're not Jedi, are you?" Ezra asked Mario and Luigi in the common room. The bros looked puzzled. "What's a Jedi?"
"Well – I'm a Jedi," Ezra said. "Kanan's a Jedi. He's my master, actually. We have special powers. The lightsaber is our weapon." He pulled his out and showed them his unique model.
"Like a beam sword!" Luigi said, taking out his hilt.
"Yeah..." Ezra said, examining it. "Interesting."

  "The navi-computer is set to fly us a short way into space, then turn around and come out of hyperspace in front of Lothal," Hera told Kanan. "With that big round ghost flying, they probably will take a while to find us," she added.
"I thought TIE's didn't have hyperdrives, though," Kanan inquired.
"Actually, the Inquisitor has a more modern TIE, and it is equipped with a hyperdrive," Hera said.
"Oi, Hera, you need to stop sounding so official," Kanan said.
"Well, how do you want me to sound?" Hera asked.
"Um, dumber?" Kanan suggested. Hera raised her eyebrows and put on that "Ahsoka" look. "Okay, okay, do whatever you want." Kanan said and rushed away. Hera took a deep breath. "Huh, that felt pretty good," she said. Ezra poked his head in. "The Toads are hosting story-time. Wanna come listen?" he asked and went back to the common room, where the Toads had dimmed the lights. Blue Toad sat on the Dejarik table and tons of Toads had gathered around him. The rest of the crew stood around, and Mario, Luigi and Peach were also there.
  Blue Toad began, "Today I'm gonna tell you the story of the Sprixie Kingdom fairies and us," he said. "So, one night, me and Mario and Luigi and the princess were talking a walk in the Mushroom Kingdom, you know? And then we saw this clearish pipe sticking out of the ground. So then for the first time, we got to see Mario and Luigi, plumb. With a dance of their hammers they fixed the pipe and this little fairy flew out, screeching about a monster. And then a monster, Bowser actually, came out and put the fairy in a jar and disappeared with her. So then the princess fell in the pipe after they did, and Mario and Luigi and me went after her. So then we went on this really awesome adventure with cherries and cats until we fought Meowser and we freed all these fairies and we got back home. And we finished our walk with fireworks in the sky," Blue Toad finished. A lot of Toads clapped. Kanan and Sabine looked at Mario and Luigi weirdly. Mario shrugged. "That's all for tonight!" Blue Toad announced. Just then Hera walked in. "We're coming out of hyperspace," she said. "I don't know what to do next."
  Kanan, who had been listening to the story, said, "I don't either."
"Let's go to an amusement park!" Ezra said happily, swinging his fists in the air. "No, Ezra," Hera replied. "This is not a vacation. We have to focus on getting these people home." Then she strode back to the cockpit. They came out of hyperspace. She landed in a grassy field, with Capital City looming in the distance. She walked back into the common room. "I'm going on an errand to buy food and fuel," she said. "Ezra, Zeb, I need to borrow some of your supplies." Ezra and Zeb looked at each other. "No," Ezra said, crossing his arms and closing his eyes. "No," Zeb said stiffly. "Alright then," Hera said and went to their bedroom.
Ezra and Zeb had a secret stash of fruit and money hidden in a secret compartment in their roof. Obviously, it wasn't entirely secret, but since the guys had arrived it became a little more secret. Once, Ezra and Zeb had kidnapped Sabine and stuffed her in there, but Kanan and Hera had quickly put an end to that.
Hera stalked into their room and opened the roof. All the fruit and money came raining down. Hera opened an umbrella and let it all flow onto the floor. Then she picked out a bunch of money, threw the fruit into the hole, and closed the compartment before it could bounce out. She hid all the money in her pants and walked out of the Ghost. "Take care of the Toads!" she called before vanishing into the tall grass. Kanan looked at Ezra. "Well, see you guys," he said and disappeared into his bedroom with Ezra, presumably to do 'Jedi stuff'. Sabine, Zeb, Chopper, Mario, Luigi, and Peach were left in the common room to watch the Toads. Chopper snorted and made a 'whatever' noise before rolling out of the room. Mario and Luigi looked at each other, shared a telepathic thought, and headed to Ezra and Zeb's cabin. There, they both pulled out their beam swords and ignited them. "Bring it, Weegee," Mario said. Then he attacked, slashing the blade which Luigi parried. Soon they were jumping all over the room, engaged in a heated up saber practice.