Our Deepest Scars

Chapter 15

The next few days that passed were the happiest that Camila had experienced in the past year. Not only were Lauren and herself becoming closer and closer, stealing kisses whenever they were alone and having deep, long conversations into the night, but she was also in a much healthier place emotionally and mentally.

Generally, Camila would feel nothing for most of the day, and if she felt an emotion it was almost always negative. But after her most recent therapy sessions (she had had two more since the first), this had been utterly reversed. She felt full of life again; no longer anxious and depressed. That wasn't to say she wasn't still struggling with those feelings, but they were not currently an overbearing presence in her life as they had been for the year previously.

The only aspect of Camila's changed personality and thoughts that remained the same was her eating disorder. For that wasn't something that just went away when she felt better. Sharon, the small girl's therapist, had told her this constantly throughout their sessions together. Recovery was a process, and Camila wasn't even nearly through it yet. But she was certainly far happier and more appreciative of her life than she had felt in a long time.

It was lunchtime. The girls were on the bus once again, but it was travelling steadily on its way to Houston, Texas. There was a great deal of excitement at this amongst the girls, as both Normani and Ally were deeply rooted in the area and had relatives there. They had been driving for almost a full day, with their drivers on constant rotation so the other could eat and sleep.

"I can't wait to see my family and friends again," Normani sighed wistfully as the bus rolled across the sandy, barren landscape.

"Neither can I." Ally lay with her head on Normani's legs and she smiled at the other girl as she answered.

Camila grinned at both of them as they continued to talk about their home and the people they cared about. She knew exactly how they were feeling; she felt the same way when they went to Miami. In Camila's opinion, there was no better feeling than performing in front of your home crowd. The atmosphere was electric.

As it was past midday, everyone on the bus besides Camila had requested to stop for lunch. They had decided a while ago to pull up at the next place that actually served food, but there hadn't been a lot of choice because the road they were currently driving along was practically in the middle of nowhere.

"I'm so hungry," Dinah groaned from the other side of the couch to where Ally and Normani were lying. Camila was curled up next to her, longing to be with Lauren, who was in the bathroom. The two hadn't told the other girls about them yet. What they didn't know was that the girls already had suspicions, which they often talked about when the Latinas weren't around.

"Same, I'm starving," replied Normani, and Ally nodded in agreement. "I want chicken wings so bad."

Camila laughed despite the slightly anxious feeling she got whenever the topic of food was brought up. If she was being totally honest with herself, she was also hungry. But saying that out loud along with the others would make her sound greedy - or at least it would in her mind.

"Well," a male voice sounded from outside the bus, and Camila suddenly realized they had come to a halt, "unfortunately I don't have chicken wings but I do have a couple of pizzas that you might like."

"Pizza!" Dinah shouted eagerly, and together with Ally and Normani, she leaped up from the couch and ran to the door which had just been opened. Hurriedly she grasped the pizza boxes from the hand of the man, who Camila could see was wearing a uniform. She imagined he must work at wherever they had acquired the pizza from.

Ally thanked the man breathlessly just before the door closed once again and the girls tore open the boxes. From her position on the couch which she hadn't moved from, Camila felt very intimidated. Uncomfortably, she shifted on the couch to face the girls, unsure of what to do. A panicked feeling was rising inside her.