Always Here [Antisepticeye x Reader]

Control

For the past three days you have experienced painful migraines. You figured that it was just a pregnancy thing. You had stayed in bed these past days because it aggravated your head to move and think. Seán insisted on tending to you before and after he had to work.

This day felt different for some reason. Your head was in the worst pain and your body ached all over. Seán had already left to go record about an hour ago. You blankly stared at the wall as you massaged your temples. Suddenly, a thought came in your head. What if I threw a knife at the wall?  You subconsciously started to reach for the bedside table. You snapped out of it and shook your head. You really were sick.

A few more minutes passed and you let out a long sigh. I need something to do, you thought. An image flashed in your mind. The walls were covered in a red substance you could only assume was blood. A mutilated body laid on the carpet and you instantly recognized the victim. It was Seán. And you were holding a bloody knife.

A shiver ran up your spine as the image went away. Why did that happen? What was wrong with you? The past couple of weeks were so nice and normal. Now everything seemed to be ruined. What would happen if Jack came in here when you had one of your urges?

A knock on the door pulled your from your thoughts. "Love, you alright?"

"Yeah, come on in."

Your boyfriend walked in with a tray that had a meal, medication, and a glass of water on it. He set it down on the bed next to you and held your hand in his.

"(Y/N), what's wrong, babe? You don't look so well."

"It's just the migraine. Don't worry about me."

"But I am worried. Not just about you, but the little one two," he placed his hand on your midsection. You placed a hand over his reassuringly.

"I'm fine, really, babe. It just hurts to think. Could you get me a cup of green tea please?" You attempted to get him far away from you.

"Yes, of course, love. Anything for you." He kissed your forehead and left the room. You exhaled breath that you didn't know you were holding in.

"Hello again, lass," a familiar voice spoke in your head.

"No," you muttered. "Leave me alone, please."

"Aww, are you begging me? Pathetic," he spat.

"Just stop. You've already done enough."

"That's where you're wrong. I need to do more."

"I'm pregnant with your baby. I think that is plenty," you said, your anger slowly boiling.

"That was only one part of the plan, lass," his glitchy chuckle filled your ears.

"Then what the fuck is your end game, Anti?!"

"You already have some idea, darling. Just wait and see what I'll- I mean you'll do."

Seán entered the room with your cup of tea. You gave him a sweet smile and kissed his cheek as he handed it to you. You blew on the steaming liquid and took a sip, relishing in the warmth it gave you. Suddenly, you began tipping the cup until the hot liquid poured on your lap. You squealed from the burning sensation on your legs, catching Jack's attention.

"What's wrong, love?" He asked as he rushed to your side. You opened your mouth to explain, but suddenly your jaw clamped shut. You tried to reopen it, but it remained snuggly shut. Instead, your arms reached up towards Jack. Your hands wrapped around his neck and your grip began to tighten. You were shocked at your actions and tried with all your might to stop, but you couldn't. Your grip only tightened.

"Oh, this is so splendid, (Y/N)!"

Stop, please! You thought as Jack's face began to turn bright red.

"Just a little more."

You watched in horror as Seán's face contorted in pain and terror. Finally, your hands released the pressure they held and Jack gasped for air. He stumbled backwards as you got out of bed.

"The only way to stop me is to kill me," you said, but Anti's voice spoke through your mouth.

"W-what? Anti?" Seán questioned between gasps.

You walked towards him. You caressed his face with one hand as you slammed your fist into his abdomen.

"Go to the kitchen and get a knife," Anti's voice commanded from your lips.

"Wh-what? No," Seán replied.

You felt your arm pulled back and shut your eyes as your fist slammed into his stomach again.

"Go. Now."

Seán straightened back up and unwillingly followed your orders. Your body involuntarily followed him into the kitchen and watched as he reluctantly chose a knife.

"The only way to stop me is to kill me." A single tear escaped your eye as you spoke. Seán's eyes met yours and you could see the sorrow in his ocean eyes.

"N-no. I can't. I won't. (Y/N), I know you're still in there. Please, baby, fight."

Your heart broke at his words. Your arm pulled back and slammed into Seán's jaw. He put a hand up to his cheek and turned towards you.

"The only way to stop me is to kill me, Seán."

"No! I won't! Just fight it, (Y/N)!"

You placed a hand on his and stared into his eyes. "The only way to stop me is to kill me. Just do it."

Anti, stop! You screamed in your mind.

"I am in control now, lass. What I say goes."

Your grip on Seán's tightened and you looked into his eyes again. "Seán, you have to kill me. Save yourself."

"No! Anti, whatever you're doing, just stop! I'll do whatever, just don't do this."

"I'm not doing anything. You are the one with the choice."

Seán didn't move but kept his sad icy blue eyes fixed on you. You met his eyes one last time.

"If you won't kill me, then I will."

You jerked his arm towards your abdomen and sent the knife into your midsection. Jack screamed as you fell to the ground. He tried to help you, but your gripped his arms and stopped his movements.

"The only way... to stop me...is to...kill me."