Smile - Joker Leto Fanfiction - {BWWM} - {COMPLETE}

T H I R T Y S E V E N

~ Abandonment Issues ~
~ day 82 ~
• J O K E R •

I hum, grinning as I reach over and slap the girl dancing for me on her butt. "Go get daddy a drink, willya sweetheart?"

She gives me a smile before turning away from me and walking towards the bar. Not soon after, another girl goes to walk past me and immediately I wrap my arm around her, pulling her close to me and away from whoever she was walking with. "Hey, gorgeous," I whisper in her ear. She looks up at me with big, innocent green eyes. She seemed a little scared of me and I thrived off of that. Seeing the fear in peoples eyes as I walked among them as though I was just like them.

"Hey, J," I hear someone say from behind me. I turn, grinning at the man I knew well to be my best business partner.

"Ah, my favorite money-maker," I chime, watching as he extends his hand to shake mine. He gives me a smile and I take his hand and shake firmly. "Angel told me you needed to talk to me about some business."

"Yeah," he says, clasping his hands together before motioning for me to sit in a nearby booth. "Angel told me about that girl you used to associate with. How she provided protection and security to Angel-"

"Okay, and?" I ask, quickly piecing together that he was talking about Cheyenne. I reflexively rolled my eyes, that being the trained reaction I would give when anyone would ask about her when in reality I was low-key interested in what people had to say about her, if anyone knew her whereabouts.

"We have some big things happening in the Kubrick District," he says, tilting his head as he watched me toy with the girl I now had in my lap. "We were thinking that since you have no use of her now, she would be a good asset for us."

"I have no idea where she is," I mumble, too distracted with the now smitten and blushing girl.

"That's impossible," he chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief. "You two were way too close for you to not have eyes on her-"

"Can't we talk about something more important?" I ask, rolling my eyes. Don't you see all these women on my arm? Can't you see this is my way of coping? I grimace at the sound of the voices in my head just as I finish my sentence. They hadn't let up even a little bit in at last a month. "I have no idea where...she is. But, that's what girls like her do. They disappear."

The man tilts his head, disappointment coating his expression. I clench my jaw, realizing he's not here for me. He's here for her. For the both of us as the team we used to be. Ever since I met her, that's all the people care about. That's all they ever associate me with. Her. It was always all about her, even in my own fucking head, it was all about her.

I inhale sharply, pushing the girl out of my lap and walking away from him, beelining towards my lounge. Some of the girls attempt to join me, but I push them away. I needed to be alone. Saying I hadn't seen her wasn't a lie. In a way, it also was. I couldn't say it was true because who knew if what I was ever seeing was the real thing.

Once I'm in the lounge, I immediately stand at the bar and make myself a drink the same exact way that I once told Cheyenne to make it. I bring my lips to the cup and down it all in one gulp, an effort to think about something else or maybe even nothing at all. I stare into the empty glass, my mind reeling back in time to the first night she ever came into the lounge. She looked absolutely phenomenal and that night, I just couldn't resist her.

My mind wanders as her hand strokes my neck, rubbing my upper back. "So, does this make me one of your girls?"

"Hm," I sigh, thinking about it thoroughly after we had just laid down rules. I turn my head and open my eyes to look at her. Her eyes were on mine, her face almost expressionless. She was calm. No attitude to offer, no senseless bickering. I don't think I liked her that way. An idea comes to mind, one I know will ignite that fire in her, piss her off to the high heavens. That girl, my girl, was fiery. "Not exactly."