T H I R T Y E I G H T

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~ Mistakes ~
~ day 83 ~
• D A M O N •

"Wrong. You're not in the circus, Mercy. Do it again. From the beginning," I state, becoming aggravated. She looks at me, knowing exactly what she did wrong, but seemingly asking if I was being serious. "Now."

She rolls her eyes, huffing as she restarts the entire training routine over again.

"I know you're stressed," I hear Suki say from behind me. "But you should take it easy on your newbies."

"She's reckless," I state, motioning towards her. "Look at her footwork. She's being sloppy because she thinks she's got it. Mercy!"

I yell so loud, she drops her katana as soon as she draws it. "I-I'm sorry, Damon, I-"

"It's fine, Mercy," Suki assures her as she rest a hand on my shoulder. I sigh, resting my head in my hands. "Why don't you go hang out with the rest of the brotherhood."

She nods, bowing towards Suki and I. Suki bows back to her, I just drop my head, pressing my fingers against his temples. As soon as the glass doors shut behind us, I can see Suki turn towards me and I know she has a look on her face that tells me that I'm not gonna enjoy the conversation we're about to have.

"What was that about?" She asks, sighing as I turn to look at her.

"I've just got...a lot on my mind," I say quietly, avoiding the truth of what it was, but she knew the truth.

"This is about Cheyenne, isn't it?" She asks, crossing her arms. I chuckle, shaking my head as I lean over the railing again. It totally was about Cheyenne. "Not everyone can be as good as her, yaknow."

I spent weeks thinking about how she was kind of right. Right about how she's no different from Joker, how I'm no different than him. Even Angel and Suki realized that. We were all criminals. Just because we didn't particularly like him didn't mean we were any better than him.

"She needed me," I say quietly, shaking my head as I stared down at the ground. "That day she came to us, had that conversation with us, you put all your differences aside and jumped right to her side, right into action. You were there for her."

"Cheyenne and I have a bond," she sighs, rubbing my back

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"Cheyenne and I have a bond," she sighs, rubbing my back. "I trust her-"

"I'm supposed to trust her," I snap, looking at Suki. "I-I'm supposed to be there for her. I've made so many promises to her and broke them. Broke her heart. I didn't even know about her past..."

"None of us knew, Damon," she says, tilting her head.

"Okay, but I slept with her for years," I remind her, taking a deep breath. "I should have known. That...That clown shouldn't have been the first person to know."

"She trusted him," Suki says, making me clench my jaw. How could she possibly trust him. "They have so much more in common than we all thought."

"No. No, I don't accept that," I state, shaking my head, walking away from her. Surely, she follows me out of the training room. "I should have been there for her. I should have listened and understood. She was supposed to trust me and then I just hurt her. Again. She forgave me and I fucked up. Again."

"I don't think there was anything you could have done, Damon," Suki assures me, following me into my office. I don't respond, I just sit in my office chair and stare out the window, my mind wandering.

I missed her. I was supposed to be close with her, we were supposed to be close and I just betrayed her because I was jealous, didn't want to accept the fact that she might have found someone else that made her happy. But, from what Suki told me on our flight to Louisiana, she and Joker are completely kaput. He told her to leave and that he never wanted to see her again and he wasn't joking around. I should have gone after her, looked high and low for her. By the time I finally decided I should, she was gone. In prison. A prison in Louisiana.

I look at Suki, ideas formulating in my head. She arches her eyebrow, scanning the look on my face. "What is that look?"

I raise my eyebrow, tilting my head as we looked at each other. She knew exactly what I was thinking. She shakes her head. "Damon," she says, her tone warning. "This is a death wish."

"I don't care," I say hesitantly, scooting forward in my chair. "Get the red chapter of the brotherhood up here. Gear up. We're taking a little trip."



i find myself wondering
if u guys actually know
how close we are to the
end 🤔

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