Perfection [boy x boy]

Chapter 13 Misunderstanding

Olivers pov

Teacher: Okay, read pages 44-51 until the next lesson. Have a nice weekend!

Finally this hellish week is over. Ever since the beginning of the week, when I jerked off thinking of Gavin, I've had a really hard time looking and talking to him without getting red and my chest hurting. I also get an erection from small things he does.

Worst of all is when he touches me. My body reacts strongly and because of it I've repeatedly done what I promised to never do, jerk off in the school toilet.

This has been my problem all week. I started avoiding him as much as possible so I wouldn't have to do it as much. 

It started with excuses like having to go to the toilet or having stomachaches. Also, I repeated the same excuses too many times so I had to come up with new ones to avoid him, like walking the other way when I'd see him. If he asked why, I'd reply with saying that I didn't see him or something similar.

I know it's rude but there's nothing I can do about it. I'd rather die than Gavin finding out that he turns me on. I don't understand what's happening to me. I thought it would only happen once but my body doesn't seem to agree. Am I in falling for him?

I take my books and walk to my locker. When I have my stuff, I look around to see where Gavin is. To my joy, I don't see him anywhere. He's probably still in the classroom.

I hurry past all the students and leave school.

I take a deep breath of the fresh air and breath out. Now, just walk... 

My thoughts are interrupted by someone calling out my name. I turn around and, to my surprise, Gavin is there. So he wasn't in the classroom huh...

Gavin: Oliver! Do you wanna come to my place? I bought a new game that we can play. You know, like old times.

Oliver: Ahh I can't today... I have to... study for the ma.. ehh I mean history test.

Why should it be so hard to talk to him? I turn around to try to avoid the conversation, but Gavin grabs my hand. My face turns red and I try to pull my and away but Gavin has an unusually firm grip.

Gavin: Oliver, there's something we need to talk about. I've noticed that you've been avoiding me. Is it something I did?

Fuuuck... Gavin must think I'm avoiding him because I hate him. All this time I've just thought about myself without thinking how Gavin would take it. I shake my head and try to get out a few words to save the situation.

Oliver: What? Noo... It's not what you think... I...

Gavin: STOP LYING!

Gavin breathes out and draws his hand through his hair.

Gavin: We've known each other for so long now that it would be strange if I hadn't noticed your avoiding behavior. So stop lying.

He lets go of my hand and it gets quiet. I try to come up with something to say to explain myself but nothing comes out.

Gavin: If you don't have anything to say, you can go study or do whatever you were going to do.

I stare down at the ground. Without getting a single word out, I see how Gavin passes me and walks to the train. 

It's the first time I've seen him like this. He seemed angry but also hurt because of what I did. 

What have I done? Why did I do all those things? What I've been so afraid of for weeks just happened. I lost Gavin again..

After calming down a bit I walk home. I lay down on the bed, staring at the roof. The words Gavin said at the school yard played several times in my head.

Without realizing it, tears begin to flow down my cheeks. Why didn't I say anything to him?