eighteen // larry ✔️

12

When Louis text Harry the news of his patients death Harry goes home immediately. It's a Friday and he's missing his afternoon class, but Harry can't go to class knowing that Louis is in pain. Harry doesn't really know what to expect because he has never seen Louis as anything more than cool and collected and of course Louis has cried around Harry but that is nothing compared to how Louis is when Harry finds him that afternoon.

Louis was on the couch, his head leaning on the arm of the sofa and there were tears streaming down his face. Freddie, their dog, had his head on Louis legs. Louis was just staring and sitting and letting the tears fall. Harry gasped a little because Louis looked absolutely broken.

"Babe." Harry says quietly, he drops his jacket and his keys on the counter before walks swiftly over to the couch. He pulls Louis into his arms and lets him cry silently into his shoulder.

Louis just sits there and cried for about twenty minutes before Harry decides to run them a bath. When the bath is ready Harry helps Louis take off his clothes and helps him into the bath before he gets in himself.

Louis hasn't spoken the whole time, he just lets himself be held by Harry.

"Lou," Harry says, "tell me what you're thinking."

Louis sighs. He pulls away from Harrys body so he can look him in the eyes.

"I just—" Louis starts, but his throat is a little sore so he coughs before continuing, "she had so much so live for. She could have taken over the world with her personality, and she stood up for what she believed, and she was honest, and when we let her out of the hospital we thought she was ready. we thought she could handle it. We all unanimously came together to approve of her discharge and— I could have said no. I could have kept her there longer and she would still be alive."

Harry wants to tell him that it's not his fault, that she chose to die and there was nothing any of them could have done to stop it but instead he just pulls Louis closer. He holds Louis to his chest and lets him sob.

At some point Harry starts to rub shampoo into Louis hair and bathing Louis. Louis just sits there and lets Harry do whatever because he is just so exhausted and so sad.

"Come on, babe." Harry says later, "let's get out. The waters cold."

Louis nods and lets Harry pull him out of the tub and wrap him into a towel. Harry pats Louis down with the towel and does the same for himself. He tugs a large sweater onto Louis and leads him to bed before saying, "I'm gonna go make us a sandwich. I'll be right back."

Louis nods again. He doesn't even want to speak because she can't speak anymore, she can't do anything anymore, so why should Louis?

Louis tugs on his hair a little because why does he even care? He knew the girl for, like, three weeks and she didn't significantly alter Louis life so why is Louis so upset?

Harry comes back with a ham sandwich for Louis and a tomato sandwich for himself. He rolls into bed with Louis and they eat in silence until all of their food is gone.

It's only around 5:00 pm when Louis falls asleep. Harry waits until he is sure louis is asleep before he stands up to clean the house. Harry washes dishes, sweeps the floor, and feeds the dog.

-

"Haz?" Louis says beside him.

Harry had crawled into bed next to Louis after he had cleaned the house. Harry has looked through his phone for a bit but fell asleep soon enough. The light now was shiny through the windows so he assumes that he slept all through the night.

"Good morning, Lou." Harry says, "how do you feel?"

"Hmm," Louis hums, "like shit. I have a bit of a headache and my throat hurts. Uhm, I'm sad. I guess there's nothing I can do about it."

Harry nods and pulls Louis closer to him, "gotta learn to cope, yeah? You can draw out your little doodles and deal with it."

Louis laughs a little, "Yeah. You're right."

Harry hums, "you know what, though?"

"What?" Louis asks, turning on his side to face Harry.

"Since you feel like shit I get to take care of you." Harry says, he pushes Louis onto his back and splays his body on top of Louis, straddling him. He kisses both of Louis cheeks, his jaw, down his neck.

Louis laughs a little, "okay you big oaf. But can we brush our teeth first? You're breath smells like Freddie's."

Harry jumps off Louis and walks to the bathroom saying, "way to ruin the mood."

Louis laughs and runs towards Harry, jumping on his back. Harry supports him immediately.
-
"Hey, Harry?" Louis asks. He was eating the eggs Harry had made him. Harry turns away from the stove to look at Louis, who just seconds ago was laughing, but now looks serious.

"Yeah?" He reply's, he flops the eggs on his plate that already had toast and hash browns on it, then sits down infringing of Louis.

"Uh," Louis puts down his fork, his hands were shaking a little, "So, uhm, with that girl dying I've kinda realized that, like, one of us could die any day. Anything could happen and I don't want to die without, uhm, doing the most I could to be happy. To be happy with myself and with my life; so I want to do everything I can to have the best life I can with uhm whatever time I have."

"Are you dying, Lou?" Harry asks, he try's to pass it off as a joke, but it comes of like he's serious.

"No, no." Louis laughs a little, "God I'm shit at this. I mean, like, I could die any day and I don't want to die without knowing that your mine."

"I am yours," Harry leans over the table and grabs Louis hand, "I'm confused as to where you are going with this?"

Louis sighs, he closes his eyes for a second before opening them again, "I want you to marry me."

"Lou-" Harry begins.

"Not now obviously, we are both young and we haven't even been in this relationship for a year yet. I just- I want you to know that I'm fully committed to you and our relationship." Louis rambles on, "like we don't have to get a ring or do any of that symbolic shit, I just want to wake up tomorrow, and any day after that, knowing that we are committed to each other and that we will get married and that I love you."

Harry nods and grins, "of course, Lou. I would love to marry you. I am committed to you. I love you, seriously."

Louis nods, he blushes a little, "I know. I know. I'm just a little off, yeah? That was kinda a shit speech."

Harry laughs a little, "It was nice. Propose again, though. When we are a little older. Come up with a better speech. Make it cry worthy, yeah? In the mean time, just know that I am committed fully, to you and only you."

Louis nods. "I love you."

Harry nods and picks up his fork to eat his eggs, "I love you too, babe. You scared me a bit in the beginning. I thought, like, you have been diagnosed with a man eating disease or something."

The end

—

Authors note:

Y'all honest to God this is a shit piece of fiction with too much drama and not enough explanation or plot so if you can get through this without cringing and leaving I commend you and thank you.

At one point I wanted to edit her into something much better but I physically can't bring myself to read more than two chapters without thinking abt killing myself, so this is her in her raw form.

Try reading something like my one shots. I think that they might be a little better. Idk I'm not writer or anything this is just a hobby soooo...