Free™

Chapter XIX

"okay then," Dad motioned me to take a seat.

I sat down, making sure I keep my distance. Sitting here and listening to what he has to say does not mean I'm not mad anymore, or that I'm ready to accept everything and take him back; I'm still mad, but willing to understand his point of view too.

Dad took another deep breath,
"I've loved you and your mom both. I've loved both of you more than any one of you can imagine and it killed me to leave, but I had to."

So Liam was right, it did kill him too.

"Before leaving, I worked as the manager of that paint company, artestic, remember? It was all good for us. We were happy. But then, our happy bubble popped when you fainted that unfortunate day and you were diagnosed with leukemia. It was like our entire world falling apart, inch by inch; in front of our eyes. Your mom used to cry all night, and I couldn't stand it. I was supposed to be there to protect you both, but I was failing miserably. I had no other option," his voice broke a little. Tears just trying to escape.

My heart broke a little. I wanted him to stop but I also wanted to know the reason behind him leaving everything behind.

So I got closer, a bit hesitant but still did. I sat beside him and gave him a side hug. It was clearly very hard on him too. I decided that if in between the story, he stops, I won't force him. I'll give him his time, even though I believe he had plenty. I'll still give him some more until he's ready.

A ghost of a smile broke onto his face.

"The bills, they were getting hard to pay. Your mom and I skipped meals and I hated it. Every bit of it. I promised your mother I'd take care of her and now she was falling asleep hungry. It killed me. I hated myself, I was disgusted. And no, no, no. It wasn't because of you. No my dear, it wasn't you. It was me. I had to take care of you, and Rose. But I didn't. And it destroyed me. I, I did what I thought was best at that time."
He looked straight into my eyes, and gave me a weak smile.

"I applied for a job abroad. I mentioned it to your mother before, but never pressed it. And within a week, I was offered an excellent job in London."

Ooh, that explains the slight British accent.

"It had a brilliant salary package and all but it required complete confidentiality. So I weighed my options, I could either sit here and see you guys hurt and breaking or I could do something about it, man up and secretly help you and pay all the bills. So a day of contemplating everything, I decided to do something. I took the job and just like that, left. Without a word. Without any warning. I left. And I'm sorry, that was not a good move. I, I, know sorry never fixes anything and it cannot reverse back time and bad decisions but it sure can change someone. I'm sorry. I really am. I'm ashamed."

I took a deep breath. That was a lot to take in.

"So what did you do all these years?" I asked.

"The moment I stepped into London, I knew I've made the wrong decision but it was too late now. I've signed the contract. And I had to work for five years. So I did. I did work. Day and night. And transferred my salary every month to pay for your bills. Your doctor helped me all these years. And even though I was paying, it still wasn't enough for the house rent and bills and unfortunately your mother had to work. I'm sorry Rose. But I'm here now. I'm here. You don't have to work anymore." He turned towards my mother who sat there wiping away the tears that escaped, giving my dad a reassuring smile.

" And I can't even tell you, how much I missed you both. I missed both of you so much. To ease the pain I drowned myself in alcohol. But don't worry, I stopped. I stopped the day, I was told I could leave. The day I was fired. I did everything that was possible to get a job here and I did. I'm back. I'm here now and I'll stay. I promise you, but please believe me. Please, please forgive me."