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"... Sorry for the inconvenience, Yoongi-ah."
Yoongi sets his bag of drinks and snacks on the coffee table in the living room of Hoseok's cramped apartment. He lets out a loud sigh, dusting his hands off, "It's alright. Jimin's out again tonight, he's meeting up with a couple of friends."
Hoseok wraps himself around a warm knitted yellow blanket on the couch, a baggy hoodie covers his body and he sits simply in his boxers. A chuck of his wrist is a visible shade of pink, a shade of irritation.
Yoongi sits down next to Hoseok. "Let me see the tattoo."
"... It's fine," Hoseok smiles softly, "I just wanted to see you."
Yoongi looks at Hoseok, and sighs again. "Please, Hoseok," he says.
Hoseok tucks his arms in, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back on the small couch. "... Did you get your hair cut? It looks nice."
Yoongi grabs Hoseok's arm. "C'mon, it's not even that bad," he yanks Hoseok's arm, and lifts his sleeve up.
Hoseok places his palm over Yoongi's eyes as he's yanked close to him, close to the point one of his knees are on the other side of Yoongi's thigh. Yoongi lowers his hand, and Hoseok sighs deeply.
Hoseok's arm puffs up, swollen. The black ink of the drawn sun aches on his pink skin. "Hoseok, it's infected." Yoongi says softly, "... You have to go to the doctor-"
"It's completely okay!" Hoseok pushes himself off the couch and slides his sleeve down, he places a large smile on his own lips, "It just needs aloe and some bandages and it will be all brand new!"
"Don't be a moron-"
"You're just over exaggerating."
"Jung Hoseok, I swear to god. I'll drag you to the ER-"
Hoseok clutches his blanket, and his voice booms. "Okay but what if I don't want to, Yoongi?" Hoseok exclaims, his voice turning into a sour hiss. "I don't care if I'm an idiot! If I go to the hospital t-they'll do something to the tattoo."
Yoongi stands up. "You're overreacting, it's just a stupid tattoo-"
"And all I've been to you is that stupid friend!" Hoseok's vice grows louder, "The clingy friend, the annoying friend, t-the useless friend! You can call it stupid, but you don't know the difference between happiness and desperation!"
"I'm tired!" Hoseok confesses, his hands drop to his side. "... I'm just... I'm tired. I look like an asshat trying to fix things. I'm always between situations. I always listen! I've been busting my ass trying to do my fucking best!"
Yoongi sits down once again in silence, he listens.
"And you," Hoseok begins to sniffle as his knuckles turn white as he grips his blanket, "... Not even for a second did you think ruining all of our friendships would hurt me so much.."
"I try to be there for you and Jungkook," Hoseok wipes his dampening cheek, "Not even a thank you because it's always just a 'Hoseok thing'."
"If you just didn't sleep with Jimin none of this would of happen," Hoseok hiccups, "Your love has always been desperation, pity, and zero self res-"
"You shut the fuck up," Yoongi hisses, and pushes Hoseok by his shoulder. "What do you know about love, huh? Tell me Hoseok."
Tears begin to flood Hoseok's cheeks after those words.
"But I fucking learned to love you," Hoseok grabs the grocery bag and throws it to Yoongi's hands. "I made sure you felt cared for, I made sure you were taken care of, and I made sure you were never alone. I hurt a lot, more than you ever know."
"But this tattoo, it's my world," Hoseok chokes up, Yoongi's eyes soften but are hidden in such an angered expression. "... Has everything I ever done for you stupid to you? Am I meaningless to you?"
Yoongi holds the bag in his hand. "... Hoseok, of course you're not, but Jimin-"
"Yoongi, just leave." Hoseok sighs. "... I'm sorry, forget this ever happened. W-We'll have fun tomorrow, I'll bring Jungkook and I-I'll just. We'll be happy again! I'll make sure we're happy again-"
Yoongi takes Hoseok's arms softly, and places them on his shoulders before developing into a hug. "... If you're tired, then hold onto to me if you need to," he softly says into Hoseok's ear. "I'm sorry for swearing earlier."
"I-I just need you to be a friend, that's all i ask for," Hoseok shakily sighs.
Yoongi pulls away slightly, and places his palm on Hoseok's cheek, wiping away a couple of tears with his thumb. Their proximity is close, closer than they've ever been.
"... You're too close," Hoseok points out quietly with a small voice.
"I know I am," Yoongi replies softly. "Do you still want me to leave?"
"... No," Hoseok mutters, lowering his eyes.
Maybe it was the salt from his tears washing away on his tongue, the water he downed for his dry throat prior to Yoongi visiting, or the release of the pent of stress he held in with his silence, but Hoseok felt relieved. His lips no longer tasted salty from the tears, but fresh. Tasted like mint, toothpaste and mouthwash.
His relief felt gentle, soft, a touch of happiness.
But it's taken away when guilt fills his heart, the few seconds of happiness is ripped from his own hands.
Hoseok pushes Yoongi on the couch, his knee between his thighs. He pulls away with more tears in his eyes.
"... It hurts me more that you'd kiss me out of pity..."
