My Journal: Highs and Lows.

Blinded

I guess I never really expected how my life was going to turn out really, I mean I came into this world where I was always told that there was so much to give but twists and turns bring me the bumps I never wanted.

The pain that I feel, no matter how many times I tell someone, will not truly go away. I feel trapped in this viscous cycle.

There is so much stuff I isolate myself from now in fear of ruin and complications, I am angry at myself. Guilt often takes me over and I feel unable and incompatible with life itself and I just don't know what to do.

Paranoia's cape has fully immersed me and left me with nothing but sheer anxiety, I can't look at someone anymore and truly understand their true feelings or intentions. I am convinced they think badly of me. I am convinced that I am a bad person.