Cause and Effect

Sixteen

A/N: "look Simba, everything the light touches is our kingdom."
Real talk tho, that picture is just beautiful <3 pretend they both have Arsenal shirts on haha. A girl can dream!

"You're never going to drop this, are you?" I sighed, turning to look at Neymar, who was lying on his back in my backyard, enjoying the last remnants of sunshine as autumn slowly slipped into winter. I was sitting beside him, close enough to slap him playfully every time he said something ridiculous, which was more often than it should have been, in my opinion.

We had been playing H1Z1, and a bit of Counter Strike which was Neymar's favourite, with Hector and Granit. But then, Granit had to leave to go to midfielders extra training, and Hector claimed he was going up north for the rest of the day to be with Sarai, who apparently had a photo shoot to attend, and would be back in England for the weekend.

Neymar and I were the only ones with nothing to do, so we'd gone into the back yard to enjoy the weather while it lasted. Neymar had taken his shirt off, claiming he wanted to tan, which we both knew was a complete lie, he already had gorgeous skin. But if he wanted to show off, I knew there was no use trying to stop him by reminding him I had a boyfriend, as he had discounted Alexis long ago.

Not that I was complaining, it wasn't a bad view.

"I told you, Nia, I'm not giving up waiting for you," he said simply, as he gazed up at the sky.

I sighed again.

"And I told you, I'm happy with Alexis," I responded, laughing a little.

He shook his head.

"Where is he now?" He asked.

I shrugged.

"He said he had a lot of things to do today, but we're hanging out tomorrow."

He shook his head at me again, smiling knowingly at the sky, as if he shared a secret with it.

"If you were really in love, you wouldn't be so casual about not seeing him or knowing where he is today. I've been in love before, I know what it's like."

"I'm not in love with Alexis, don't jump to conclusions."

"Have you been in love before?" He asked curiously, turning his head to look at me, as I sat beside him.

"No I haven't, I don't think so," I replied.

I'd had one boyfriend before Alexis, and let's just say, there was a reason I never spoke about him now.

"You're a hard nut to crack, aren't you," Neymar chuckled.

I smiled at him.

"Either that," he continued, "Or maybe you're already in love, you just don't understand what to do with the emotion, so you push it away."

"Maybe," I said, unthinkingly, my thoughts still dwelling on the past.

I wanted to change the subject. Neymar's words were bringing unwanted feelings from not only the past, but the present, to the surface. I'd thought I'd silenced them forever. I knew that Neymar shouldn't still have this affect on me, but somehow, he always made me question every decision I'd ever made regarding him.

Maybe it would always be like this. But I knew one thing, I needed him in my life now, he'd become important to me. So these feelings needed to stop.

"What exactly are you expecting me to do?" I asked him. "I know you think you know what I'm feeling, but you don't. If you want to stay friends, don't keep bringing this up."