Varian x Reader

I Care

Trigger Warning: Self-harm

Varian let more tears roll down his cheeks as he looked at his encased father. Rudiger backed away in fear as Varian reached for a sharp knife. He stared at his reflection in it for moment.

"It's my fault," Varian as more tears escaped his eyes. He held the knife over his arm. "I deserve this." He brought the knife down and created a small cut in his skin. He did it again. And again. And again...

~~~~~

It had been days since you'd seen Varian or Quirin. You were really starting to get worried, especially with the snow storm that had passed and the rocks getting worse. You took a deep breath and bravely walked towards Varian's home.

You reached the front door and slowly pushed it open. "Hello?" you called out. "Varian? Quirin? Anyone home?"

"(Y/n)!" Varian exclaimed seemingly appearing out of nowhere. You took notice of the sleeves of his shirt. He always had them pushed up to his elbows, but right now they were covering the entire length of his arm.

"Hey," you said walking towards Varian. "I'm glad to see you're okay. I haven't seen you in a while."

"Uh, yep, fine," Varian said subconsciously rubbing his arm.

"Umm," you paused thinking of what to say. "Would you want to go on a little walk? Get out of here for a little bit?"

"Uh," Varian hesitated. "Sure."

You smiled, and he followed you out the door. You both walked along the roads and into the woods. Varian acted so strange the whole time. He seemed to be so stiff and nervous, almost like he was hiding something.

"Are you okay?" you asked after a while.

"Yeah, couldn't be better," Varian said. "Why?"

"You're just acting so on edge," you said. "And why are your sleeves down? You always push them up."

"Just trying something new," Varian said.

A thought suddenly crossed your mind. "Roll up your sleeve," you said.

"What?" Varian asked.

"Just roll up your sleeve," you said.

"Why?" Varian asked.

"Just do it," you said grabbing onto his sleeve.

"No," he said trying to fight you.

You gasped when you finally exposed his arm. There were cuts all over him. Some looked fresh while others looked like they were a few days old. 

"Varian?" you said with fear in your voice. He wouldn't look at you. "Why would you do this?"

"What difference does it make?!" Varian exclaimed ripping his arm out of your grip. "There's no one left who cares, anyway!"

"But your dad--" you tried to say.

"My dad is gone!" Varian yelled with tears falling out of his eyes. "It's my fault! I deserve this!"

"Varian," you said as you gently took hold of his arm again. "You can't think like that. You don't deserve this." You tried to roll up his sleeve again. He took hold of your hand to make you stop. You looked at him with pleading eyes. He let go and allowed you to proceed.

You rolled up his sleeve until you had a good view of all the cuts on Varian's arm. You leaned down and planted a small kiss on one cut. Varian looked at you with wide eyes. "I care," you said.

You lowered yourselves to the ground and sat. You spent the rest of the afternoon planting a kiss on every cut. Some of the worst wounds can be healed with love.