[1] broken boy • Bellamy Blake

08

"And I could live, I could die
Hanging on the words you say
And I've been known to give my all
And jumping in harder than
Ten thousand rocks on the lake
So don't call me baby
Unless you mean it
Don't tell me you need me
If you don't believe it
So let me know the truth
Before I dive right into you"
- 'Dive' Ed Sheeran

"I'm not leaving you here alone, dumbass."

( • )

Stefan didn't listen to the Unity Day speech given by Chancellor Jaha. He didn't go on the Ark, why go on the ground? Plus, it was all shit anyway. Sure, it was an attempt to bring everyone together, but the Ark was a shit hole, and a lot of people saw right through it.

The boy sat in a log, maneuvering a makeshift knife around in his hands. It had been a few days since Stefan and Bellamy's kiss. Stefan hasn't been able to get it off his mind, while, Bellamy was trying to do anything to get it off his.

It pained the younger boy, it pained him to think that Bellamy probably didn't feel the same way. Bellamy had avoided him at all costs. The day after it happened, Stefan told Octavia and they both squealed in excitement. Octavia in her own time asked Bellamy about it and he quickly shut down the subject and walked off.

Stefan wanted to cry, run away, sit in the woods and wait for grounders to find him and kidnap him.

Stefan wondered a lot about how most people do go through the same thing, but with his rough past of being shunned and hurt, he thought maybe love just wasn't for him. He watched Octavia leave through the gates at night, running off to her grounder friend. He wished he could have that. He wished he had someone that he'd break the rules for. That seems like a thing someone on the ground would do for their loved one.

Stefan slowly dragged his knife across the dirt, hunched over, drawing small shapes and characters before swiping it away and restarting.

Stefan hadn't been in the best condition, he hadn't eaten in a while, although not many people have, but he was skinny. Skinnier than most. He questioned if Bellamy had noticed how thin he had gotten. But, Bellamy hadn't been around enough. He was always hunting, building, or barking orders. Octavia noticed though, she had forced a piece of cooked panther down his throat at one point.

He didn't tell her he threw it up and hour later. 

But besides the point, Stefan wasn't feeling well at all. He wanted Bellamy back.

He wished the kiss never happen.

Because maybe Bellamy wouldn't have distanced himself and they could still hold hands when Stefan was scared or cold.

But Stefan realized he couldn't change the past and just slowly lived through the past few days.

And back to life, where the boy watched a group of delinquents listen to the Unity Day speech.