fake | jihope ✓

🌌 62 🌌

slight tw// mentions of rape and manipulation.

-hoseok's letter-

My dear Park Jimin,

I'm not sure where to start.

By the time you find this, I'll be gone from your life forever, just like you wanted. I didn't leave any of my clothes here because I figured you wouldn't want to live around anything that reminded you of me. I can respect that.

But before I let go, there are some things you should know.

I guess I'll start with Yoongi, though the topic makes me sick.

About a year ago, way before I met you, Yoongi and I ran into each other at the place I used to work. I needed money, as I was falling very far behind on my bills and my power had already been shut off for a few days. I was desperate. He offered to pay me if I did something for him. Before I knew it, he forced himself on me. I tried not to think about it because I just needed to get paid.

The next day, he paid me but he told me he made a video. He said if I didn't do the things he wanted, he'd release it to the world. He knew I would lose my job and all other opportunities for careers if he leaked the video, so I did what he wanted, but he never paid me again unless I begged for money.

Before I met you, he stopped using me to a certain extent. He would still make me send pictures, but he didn't use my body for about a month before I met you.

I thought he was going to stop tormenting me, but I knew he never would as soon as he put his hands on you. My Jimin. Well, I guess you're not mine anymore. I thought Yoongi had moved on from me and decided to be with Taehyung, but I was wrong. He just wanted to mess with Taehyung like he messed with me.

After he put his hands on you, he brought up the video again. I knew that if you saw it, something like this would happen, so I did everything I could to prevent it. I didn't want to lose you, Jiminie. I'm so selfish.

He forced himself on me again and again these past few weeks, and he hurt me in ways that I thought were unimaginable. I was living in fear and constantly hiding my bruises from you. I didn't want something bad to happen to us. I couldn't stand the thought of your reputation being ruined.

But he leaked the video.

Jin, Namjoon.. they turned against me. They called me a whore and disgusting. I guess they're right.

This whole experience with Yoongi has been a nightmare. He took so much from me, and he brought back memories that I thought I had buried, which resulted in me relapsing and hurting myself. But I couldn't tell you the real reason behind my depression and anxiety, so I made it up. I couldn't bear to burden you.

I guess it was all for nothing, though.

But I have to say one more thing, one last thing before I go.

I know everything that happened between you and Jeon Jungkook. I know he hurt you in ways similar to how Yoongi hurt me. I know what he did to your back and your leg and your mind. I'm so sorry, my Jimin. I should have been there to protect you from him, but I didn't know.

I also found out that he's in this town.

For the past few days, I've been searching for him, and I think I found where he's living for the time being.

I'll make sure he regrets hurting you, I promise. He'll never come near you ever again, even after I'm gone.

I won't tell you where I'm going to be when I disappear, because I know you won't look for me. You're a bit stubborn.

I wish you the best, Park Jimin. Please find somebody who will protect you and love you forever. Find someone who isn't fake, like me.

Even when I'm gone, I'll never forget you.

I love you so much, Jimin.

I'm sorry.

-Jung Hoseok