(a/n) In this chapter there's actually a lot of triggers, I'm sorry. Self harm and schizophrenic thoughts is what we're at. If you don't want to read that, skip this chapter, please. If not, enjoy reading, even though it's a very serious and scary topic.
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(Tylers pov)
It's three am. Josh and Jenna are both asleep. I wish, oh yeah I wish I was asleep as well. But no of course I'm not. No, it's three am but Tyler has to be awake. And of course I couldn't be alone, no of course I couldn't. Why am I never alone?
I walk into the kitchen and grab a cup to fill with water. I'm too afraid to drop a glass as my hands are shaking. "Tyler." I hear the whispers go around. Many of them.
Too many.
I walk to the sink and pour water into the cup. They won't stop talking.
Whispers.
"You must find your home."
What are they even saying. My head is going crazy. I hear them. I hear them again. I shouldn't be awake.
" It won't get much better." It's right behind me and I drop the cup. I turn around. Nothing. Of course there's absolutely nothing. Nothing, nowhere. But I hear them. I hear him. He's here. But isn't he always?
"You don't even try."
I look around. Why is there nothing? Why can't I see anyone? Why am I crazy? I can't, I shouldn't.
I look in the mirror on the wall in the hallway next to the kitchen. I appear to see fear. I whisper. "This is it."
In the mirror I appear to see nothing else, but myself as a face, a hollowed out space. I had a razor just in case.
I will not use it, I will not use it, I will not use it, I will not use it, I will not use it. I think
"You will use it." Right in front of me. The sound, no image. I hear him I hear him I hear him.
"Why." I whisper.
My hands keep shaking. The water is still on the floor. Now I am too. Pulled up knees, head tilted down. I think I should stay here like this. I can't hurt anyone like this. What if I hurt anyone? Jenna. No I cannot hurt anyone.
"You can."
I won't
"You will."
Why do I hate me so much? Where does he come from. I think it's time to say goodbye. To the earth and now my worthless life. Everything I've ever made, is dead now.
"Inside the grave." At my side. Why can't I not see him. His voice is so deep. Blurryface.
He's here he's here he's here he's here.
"Take it."
My hands are shaking a lot. I take it. I take it I take it I take it.
"You must."
I must.
Haven't you taken enough from me?
"Taken. I haven't taken. You have taken from me. Worthless you are, worthless."
Won't you torture someone elses sleep?
"Sleep. You won't sleep."
He's in front of me. I see his shadow. Red eyes. Bright red. Everything is fading. Blurry. So ... blurry. Blurryface.
