Equals

Chapter 22

Alone

Seconds after he’s gone I realize—I’m completely alone, I really don’t have anyone worth fighting back for anymore…

I start walking away from the hospital, setting up camp the same place I did with Maddy the night before becoming a Servie. I lay down when I feel something sharp in my pocket impale my skin. I reach down, pulling out a sharp point, covered with blood. I rub it away with my blanket. When the blood clears I’m met by a small silver ‘M’ and ‘A’ entangled together on the tip. I feel my blood boiling, without warning I feel my eyes switching to their luminescent green, sending a light green glow on my hands. I clutch the pin tight in my hands, walk to the edge of the hill, looking down in a small trench, and let it slip from my fingers.

I search the rest of my clothes for anything else. I eventually find the holo chip from that night. I decide to hold onto it. It’s the only way I’ll get to see them both like they were, moving and alive. I gently slide it into the holo and watch as the footage come to life in front of me. I don’t listen to the words, I’m really not interested. Most of it is Michael, saying his goodbyes, but at the end there’s a shot of Maddy, giving him a hug goodbye, tears swelling in her old brown eyes. I skip the ending. I watched this to see them alive, not watch him getting the life sucked out of him by my best friend, but once the scene is over, it replays his last words, and the holo goes dark.

I try to sleep, and I do for about two minutes when I hear footsteps behind me. My eyes switch to night-vision, but don’t find anything. “Ugh turn it off! It’s just me, calm down I’m not here to shoot you…”

“Why are you here?!”

“Is that any way to talk to your best friend?”

“Since when are you my best friend, Madison?”

“Oh, so all of that talk back at the hospital was just a bunch of crap?”

“Well, not until you decided to toss it in the garbage…”

“I never decided anything; you walked out on your own. Did I ever tell you to leave? No, all I said was that I was happy the way I was and—“

“I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID! I DON’T NEED YOU TO ‘PAINT A PICTURE FOR ME,’ does that sound familiar?!”

“No.”

I roll my eyes, not that she can see. “Why? What should I remember?”

“Nothing, it’s stupid and it was just an argument we got into…a long time ago.”

“You mean before you became a Servie?”

“Yeah...”

“Damn, it was a long time ago.”

“Look, why are you here, Maddy? Every time you come I just end up getting pissed at you and one of us storms off.”

“I felt kinda guilty about the way I was acting. Maybe I do want to change…I just don’t know it.”

“Trust me, if you knew, you would understand. But you’re just another air headed Perfect—no offense…”

“Well you’re just a cold, empty war-machine created by a psycho-path, no offense…”

“CAN YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!?”

“No! Because the second I leave you’re gonna be alone, and you’re gonna want me back. You’re not going to send away your best—ex-best friend. You were too nice.”

“And you were smart enough to know when to back off of me…You realize I could break you in half right now if I wanted to, right?”

“Yes.”

“And…you’re not afraid of me?”

“Not really. I may be a silly Perfect, but the old Maddy’s brain is still here somewhere. You know the smart one that you like for some reason.” I laugh a little.

“The other Maddy would’ve been smart enough to walk away.”

“How many times do I have to tell you…I’m not the old Maddy?”

“I know.”

“Well, you better…because you’re stuck with this one. Sorry…”

“It’s not your fault…entirely.”

“Whose fault is this?”

“I would say...twenty-five percent Calix, twenty-five percent Maria, twenty-five percent you and twenty-five percent…me…”

“I need to ask you something…a favor…”

“Sure, I mean…I guess I owe you. What do you want?”

“Change me.

“I don’t think that’s possible…”

“I don’t care! Just do something! I don’t want to be this anymore, change me. I’ll do whatever it takes—torture, labor, surgery, anything…”

“You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into…”

“…I don’t care…”