Theory [TOM HOLLAND]

SIXTY FOUR

bride or dies
[4 participants]

lizzie
MEL KILLED MY FISH

mel
IT WASN'T MY FAULT

lizzie
YOU KNEW BUBBLES WAS ALLERGIC TO GLUTEN

mel
NO I DIDN'T

mel
HE'S A GOLDFISH

mel
WHAT KIND OF FISH IS GLUTEN INTOLERANT

lizzie
YOU WOULD KNOW IF YOU HAD ACTUALLY READ THE BOOK OF INSTRUCTIONS I LEFT YOU

mel
LIZZIE IT WAS 608 PAGES WITH PICTURES AND A GLOSSARY

lizzie
WELL SUE ME FOR BEING THOROUGH

mel
IT HAD A SECTION ABOUT BUBBLES'S LIFE

mel
HE'S BEEN ALIVE FOR 1.67 WEEKS

lizzie
YOU KNOW WHAT ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS WATCH HIM FOR 2 HOURS WHILE I HELPED JUNE GET DRESSED

mel
WHO BRINGS A FREAKING FISH TO A WEDDING

lizzie
I HAD A PLUS ONE

mel
that's just sad lizzie

lizzie
i know

lizzie
but ricardo cancelled on me in an email

lizzie
i don't get men

mel
i know you haven't had a date in months

lizzie
WHO FEEDS A FISH GLUTEN

mel
I JUST WANTED TO SHARE MY CROISSANDWICH

scarlett
did you just say croissandwich

scarlett
as in

scarlett
a delicious savory treat constructed out of a flaky pastry layered with meat and cheese

mel
i immediately sense danger

mel
lizzie help

lizzie
over bubbles's dead body

scarlett
that's funny because i brought a croissandwich with me this morning

scarlett
and it mysteriously disappeared

mel
don't look at me i was color coding the buffet table all morning

scarlett
that's not an alibi that's an aliblie

scarlett
you already did that two weeks ago because you're obsessively organized

mel
someone put the tater tots by the mini pies i need to go

scarlett
i'm going to smack you with bubbles's dead corpse

lizzie
NO