A Final Season of Rick and Morty

2 -- Butter Passing Robot and Bitches

Laughing and shooting as if in a laser tag arcade, Rick and Morty shoot apart a Terminator-looking robot in an alien alleyway. Rick pockets an intricate piece from inside the robot just as a yellow portal opens up. Out pops another robot to which Rick and Morty shoot it down and Rick collects the same piece from this one too. Another portal spits out another robot and Rick and Morty continue, among the remains of dozens of previous robots.

Morty asks, "Do you think these guys are really coming from the future?"

"How hilarious would that be!" Rick laughs. "There'd be no way they could know their robots die the second they get here. All they'd know is that their future still blows. Hahah!" shooting another and harvesting another piece. "Cha-ching! Future technology, baby!"

Then the robots stop coming. Rick lowers his gun, "Aww. Well, my pockets were getting full anyhow." He turns to a hidden lockbox embedded in the wall. "Man, they must really want to kill me before I get my chip. What do you think, does this look messed with?" pointing to a groove and smudge.

"Uh....." then Morty grins, "Looks mess-E. Kinda looks like if you were a dolphin, I could see you as a dolphin, they're pretty smart, heh heh."

Rick half groans, "Why do I ask you anything..."

They hear another portal open behind them and turn to shoot, but a blue cat-like tribal humanoid comes out this time, as if he could be from Avatar. Disappointed, Rick mutters, "Oh....... Wow. Never thought I'd be glad I wasn't immortal. Their future sex is worse than sex if the future were like Demolition Man. Sucks for you Morty."

"Future?—" the avatar scoffs, but he stopped caring the instant he uttered the word, "—Hey, have you guys seen any game-bots? I'm borrowing my friend's avatar to see if they malfunctioned in your dumb planet's atmosphere but..." then he sees their guns and the robot debris. "YOU—YOU—You fucked up our LAN party you fucking bitch! Do you know who my dad is you idiot!" and throws a robot-part at Rick's head—

—Rick bats it away, but it still hurt. Looking annoyed to the max, Rick opens a portal and growls, "Morty, go home. I just need a minute. James Cameron never gave me a refund..." slamming his knuckles into his palm.

As Morty gets one foot into the portal, he hears the avatar make one gut wrenching noise after another, so Morty turns around out of morbid curiosity to see Rick kicking the guy in the crotch, over and over.

Just as Morty's curiosity ends, Rick stops. Morty catches a glimpse of Rick taking a device out and flashing it in front of the guy's eyes. He sees the guy look confused as the guy says, "What the fuck just happened, where the hell am I—Answer me you idiot—you cheese-banger!"

Rick teases, "Oh? That can't be nice. I'm guessing it means you want my revenge for Titanic too," and starts kicking his crotch again while cackling.

Morty rolls his eyes and enters the portal to the Smith family living room. He sees Summer watching TV and sits down with her. "Hey. What's on?"

She sits up and gawks at him, noticing there's no Rick, and almost smiles, "Did... Did you just ditch Rick to hang out with me?"

"Oh. No," innocently missing that it would have been a big deal to her.

"Oh..." she grumbles, crossing her arms and flopping back into the couch.

Outside, Rick exits a portal on the front lawn, whistling with glee, then sees yesterday's homeless woman sitting at the door, and frowns.