Undertale one shots

funny stuff part 2

David (a rasist to monster): can't tie your shoes?
Alex (me): I can't tie my shoes but I can fuck your bitch!
Sans:OHHHHHHHHHHHH
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Bad big brother (sister)
Alex:*kicks the door open* HELLO BITCHES
Ella:why are you yelling?
Alex:because I fucking want to bitch!
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Frisk:SISTER!!
Alex:kiddo what's wrong?
Frisk:sans ate my pie!
Alex:he did. I WANTED THAT PIE. SANSSS!
..............
chara(before the buttercup indecent):sissy I have a bo bo
Alex:oh no let me see it kiddo
Chara:it's bleeding!
Alex:oh honey it's ok
Chara:will you kiss it?
Alex: are you KIDing me? That's fucking disgusting no way!
..............
A gift for my girlfriend
🎶AND IIIIIIII🎶
🎶WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUU🎶
...............
Sans:hey bro what do you want to eat?
Chara:the souls of the innocent!
Alex:a bagel
Chara:NOOO!!
Alex: 2 bagels
................
Alex:oh God sans is gonna kill me
Pafriskus:fear not Alex we..... I pafriskus am fine.
Alex:nothing about this is fine
Pafriskus:and that's not the best part.
Alex:there is no good parts either
Pafriskus:after all these years..... I finally have hair!
Alex:there goes all of our happy endings
Pafriskus:IT'S AMAZING!!
Alex:un-fuse and un-die right now!
Pafriskus:I have to sing!
Alex:papyrus NO!!!!
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Chara:*kicks the door open* DREEMURS HOLY FRICK!!!
Asgore:NOOOOO my flowers 💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐!!!!
Alex:it's ok dad
Asriel:don't cry dad!
Chara:I'm demanding a chocolate cake!
..............
Meanwhile in the au where the letter M doesn't exist
Alex:what ya doin'
Sans:playing video gays...... *looks at the camera and smiles*
...............
Toriel: please stay. I'm doing this because I love you...
Alex:🎶IF YOU LOVE ME LET ME GOOOOOOOOOOOOO🎶
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Trainertale Alex:*shows a picture too Arceus of Hellen* see her? She's a real HELLen so if you see her *eyes turn red* A T T A C K
Arceus:*has a angry face*
Trainertale Alex:adda girl
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(Alex reacting to underTAIL)
Alex*trying to press the true reset button but sans is holding her back* LET ME FORGET!!!!!!!!
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(Ice pokemon is surprised to see ice)
Trainertale frisk:but your made of ice
Trainertale Alex:well if you saw a cafe of human flesh you would be surprised too
Trainertale frisk:good point
...............
Mettaton:did I get anything out of this? No. It was completely and utterly horrible
Alex:he kissed a guy
Mettaton:no I didn't!
Alex:yes you did!
Mettaton:did.not.
Alex:did did did did 🎶did did did duh duh duh did so duddle did🎶
Ella:urr I can brake this tie. He totally did *shows a picture of Mettaton and papyrus kissing
.............
Mettaton:listen here you blood sucking vampire! I won't let you bully me anymore!
Alex:oh really? How so?
Mettaton:well I happen to find out some scandalous information that I don't think you would be keen on me spreading
Alex:in huh (does not care)
Mettaton:so here's the deal you let me and papyrus (to Alex papyrus is like a brother and she is very overprotective like sans) do our thing or I will tell princess Torre (my girlfriend in real life Undertale oc. Torre is basically Toriel and Asgores first child) EXACTLY how you feel about her.
Alex:*flinches*
Mettaton:ohohoho
Alex:*walks to Torre*
Mettaton:huh where are you going?
Alex:hey Torre
Torre:oh hey Alex what's up?
Alex:I just wanted to tell you that I.... Like you *holds a rose* will you be my girlfriend
Torre:*gasp* yes yes yes yes *kisses Alex and skips away*
Alex:*walking toward Mettaton with hearts following her* WHAT THE FUCK IS UP!!!!?????
And that's how torre and Alex got together
...........
Storyshift Asriel:welcome to the underground
Storyshift Alex:how was the fall?
Ss Asriel:if you wanna look around
Ss Alex:give us a call
Ss Asriel:we don't humans often
Ss Alex:W E R E  H A P P Y  Y O U  J U S T  D R O P P E D  I N
Ss Asriel: I'll be so popular when I show all the monsters what I just brought in
Ss Alex: hey Assy mind ya manners
Ss Asriel:,can it Alex no time for banter
Ss Alex:call me what you want I got thick skin (get it? Cause Alex has skin while Asriel has fur)
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Papyrus:hey what's up
Alex:I need your help could you come here *looks at drunk sans on the couch dancing*
Papyrus: I can't I'm buying clothes
Alex:ok well hurry up and come over here
Papyrus:I can't find them
Alex:....... What do you mean you can't find them?
Papyrus:I can't find them there's only soup
Alex: what do you mean there's only soup?
Papyrus:it means there's only soup
Alex:WELL THEN GET OUT OF THE SOUP ILLE!!!
Papyrus:all right you don't have to shout at me
....
Papyrus:there's more soup
Alex:what do you mean there's more soup?
Papyrus:there's just more soup
Alex:GO TO THE NEXT ILLE!!!!
Papyrus:there's still soup
Alex:WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?
Papyrus:I'm at soup
Alex:what do you mean your at soup?
Papyrus:I mean I'm at soup
Alex:WHAT STORE ARE YOU IN?!?!?
Papyrus:I'M AT THE SOUP STORE!!!!
Alex:WHY ARE YOU BUYING CLOTHES AT THE SOUP STORE!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Papyrus:FUCK YOU!!!!!
............
Alex:hey there my buddy chim pall friend fellow amego brother I got to warn ya my home slice bread slice of you take one more diddle darn step right there I 'm gonna ha vs to diddle darn S N A P  Y O U R  N E C K. You hear that? don't kill anyone!!
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(After a bunch of genocides)
Asriel:have you ever looked at someone and wondered 'what is going on inside there head?'
Alex:I want to die
................
Oh btw I was wondering if anyone wanted me to do a chapter on one of the AU Alex's since everyone is different because a bunch of people for some reason really liked the story I thought off for my oc Alex. It's ok if you don't want me to.
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Alex:ok remember what mom said *whistles*
Chara:*bird noises*
Alex:the fuck
.........
Alex:I'm bringing sexy back
Asriel:OHHHHHHHH
Alex:the mother boys don't know how to act
Asriel:OHHHHHHHHH
.............
Chara:,hey me and azzy are what about to jump off a clift wanna join
Alex:oh my god my dad prepared me for this ha YES!!
..........
Alex:I'm gonna jump!
Frisk:don't do it you have so much to live for!
Alex:like what?
Frisk:.....
.......
Alex:I'm gonna jump!
Frisk:don't do it!
Chara:do a flip
..........
Chara:girls gotta take there time getting pretty. You think that all this was an accident?
Alex :yes. Yes your were.
Sans:OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
.............
Alex:oh my god. Sans is going to kill me
Papfriskus:fear not dear Alex. For we..... I papfriskus and fine
Alex:there is nothing fine about this
Papfriskus:and that's not the best part
Alex:there are no good parts either
Papfriskus:after all these years I finally...... HQVE HAIR!!
Alex:there goes everyone's happy endings
Papfriskus:it's so beautiful
Alex:un-fuse and un-die right now!
Papfriskus:I must sing
Alex:papy no
...............