Life and Love (My Fight Against Cancer)

The Challenge

In life we are bound to face different journey. We have our own obstacles that we need to go through and it is written in our book, that no matter how much we avoid it, I reckon if it's bound to happen it will happen.

I have been living a healthy life as what I believed it is. I don't drink, smoke and I even tried to avoid eating much meat. I always make it a point to have a little exercise everyday because at work I will be bound to sit the whole day doing every tasks.

As an exercise, I would walk from my place to my workplace which is between 20-30mins walk depending on the speed of my steps . More often, I would have an hour walk in a day and was able to save my fare to and from the office.

The dream of letting my parents experience a good life is my armour in this busy world.

The life in the city is far more different from what I have in the province. But my dreams gives me the courage to conquer everything just to land any job available. And so I did.

It wasn't an easy way. I was like in a ship sailing conquering huge waves. But it won't stop me from sailing.

I am blessed to land on a job in my chosen field. I love what I am working. My colleagues are all nice and they're fun to work with. They're not selfish of sharing to me their  knowledge and I have and been learning a lot of things from them not only purely business but they're open to share few ideas as what life is.

House and work life routine that I have everyday with a little bit of grabbing something from the supermarket whenever I run out of supply. Not that I am living a boring life. Occasionally meet some friends who also happens to explore the city.

Slowly beating all the challenges that I am going through in this busy streets only to find out that I am bound to face a bigger one. Bigger than I have expected it to be. I wasn't prepared of course. Hearing that news makes me feel so broken. The thought that I am still young for this new challenge. It took me a week of crying, thinking about everything.

Acceptance is always the key in winning every battle. I need to accept this challenge, surrender everything to God and ask for His strength and guidance to fight with this.

A new challenge. How will I conquer this? What am I supposed to do? I can't work for the time being? How will I survive? The medication and my daily needs? Oh I forgot to mention the bills? Of course the landlord won't allow me to stay without paying the rent, right? Which I fully understand because it is their means to support their children. And my main concern in this battle are my parents. I do not want them to be sad. I always want them to be happy and experience a good  life. I don't want them to get worried on me which I know they can't avoid.

What am I supposed to do?

We got several choices when it comes to facing our obstacles. We either fight for it or just give up depending on the situation. On a personal note, I would always choose to fight.

After a week of battling with my emotions. All the questions that I have in my mind were answered. I will fight for this. Tell the situation to my parents, explain in a subtle way even if I don't know how. Help them also in their process of acceptance. And the rest of the worries surrender everything to God because I know God will never give us problems that we can't handle. Hmmp I think God trusts me so much for giving me this new challenge while I am still trying to beat His other obstacles.. In everything I should not allow fear overpower my faith. I trust Him so much and I know I will win this battle.

And this that I have read from the hospital is indeed true that;

Cancer is limited
It cannot cripple love,
It cannot shatter hope,
It cannot corrode faith,
It cannot eat away peace,
It cannot destroy confidence,
It cannot shut out memories,
It cannot silence courage,
It cannot invade the soul,
It cannot reduce eternal life,
It cannot quench the spirit,
It cannot lessen the power of resurrection.

This is only cancer and GOD is far more bigger than anything else in this world. I will win this battle through prayers and be living a life again.

A new challenge to face and I am now ready to take the first step. 

And I am looking forward to my frangibleheart version 2.0 - cancer free..

I will be living my life again in Gods perfect time.

** 26 February 2018 **