Young Justice Robin x Male Deadpool Reader

Taste The Rainbow!

"Hello, who are you?"

(Y/N)'s POV

The kid didn't respond, just started into my eyes for what seemed like at least 7 Taco Tuesdays. Suddenly he grabbed the cat off of my lap and set it on the ground. He proceeded to climb up the chair and settle himself on my thighs.

My mind went blank "Huh......" It took awhile for me to locate the shattered pieces of my subconscious and communicating factor. "Okay then," I said simply as Alfred brought out some delicious-smelling food. No one seemed to notice though, they seemed keen on staring at the toddler on my lap with wide eyes. Well, not all eyes were widened. Wayne seemed to tense a bit.

"I assume that you would like to change your place of seating, Master Damian?" Good Ole' Alfredo said in his crisp English-y voice.

"I wish to dine in this location this evening." Dami nodded.

'Jeez, when this kid is 5 he'll already have a better vocabulary than I do right now.'

'I take offense to that. My vocabulary can give that of Shakespeare a run for his money.'

'Hey! Did you know that Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is the longest word ever? Apparently, it's a lung disease or somethin'.'

'Wowsa, really? Anyways, random thought I just had, hear me out, Chris Pratt is hot. Like, if I was in his age range, I would totally be all over him. He rocked that role as Starlord. Robert Downey Jr. isn't too bad on the eyes either. They're both just so hoootttt!'

"Man, why are you drooling?" I hear White Streak ask, slightly disgusted. I snap out of my thoughts on (hot!) Marvel heroes.

"Oh nothin', just thinking about hot superheroes, can't deny that I love a man or woman in uniform." I say dreamily. I could see them exchange amused looks.

"Really?" Robby-Robin asked, grinning.

"Oh you betcha, specifically Starlord, Ironman, and just recently, good ole' Batsy." I knew what I was doing and let me say, I'm enjoying every frickin' moment of it! I could see Wayne choke on his chicken soup. I had to work ('You don't gotta go to work, work, work, work, work, work, work~!'  'Stop.') hard not to burst out laughing at the sight.

"Really?" White Streak looked interested in the conversation now. "Why?".

I had to stamp down another laugh, "Well, first of all, that jawline could cut diamonds! Second reason, two words. Eight. Pack. Third, I've always had a thing for dark and broody type guys, that's why Hades is my favorite Greek god. Their just so mysterious and hot!" This has to be the best dinner ever. Well, it's the only dinner I've been to besides that one at the homeless shelter. That was a crazy Christmas.

"That's really interesting!" The blonde balanced her chin in her hands with a shit-eating grin.

"I mean, I guess. I don't see why it's a big deal. It's like impossible to be able to spot him and when you do, he gives you one of those glares that makes your heart melt." I clasped my hands together, dramatically swooning.

"I'm pretty sure when Batman glares at someone, he's not going for romantic, I'm pretty sure he's trying to you to crap your pants." Barbara says logically. She looks like she's having a real hard time keeping her laughter in.

'Aren't I a genius?'

'This is going to make the rest of our stay awkward and uncomfortable.'

'Totally worth it!'

It remained quiet for the next ten minutes, the only noise was the light tapping of silverware against the porcelain plates.

"Hey! Quit it!" A voice suddenly rings out. Everyone's attention snaps over to where Blondie and The Son of Gray is sitting, Blondie appears to be flinging peas at Dickie with her spoon.

"Make me!" Blondie grins at him, readying another pea for launch. Dickie grabs a piece of bread from the plate nearby and throws it at her with good aim. It lands in her hair getting crumbs all over.

She gasps and touches the top of her hair and then glares at Dickie "Oh. You are so dead." She grabs her straw from her drink and sucks some of the liquid up into the straw before Turing the end of the straw towards Robby-Poo, she proceeds to spit it out at him, getting the front of his shirt wet.

I can hear Wayne yell at them to knock it off, White Streak is cheering them on, Dami is munching on a piece of lettuce, Timmy Bear is just eating his food with a deadpan expression, Barbie-Barbara is leaning back in her chair casually taking a sip of her water, Cassie's face is calm while she takes a piece of bread from the platter and bites into it. And me? I'm just staring at the ongoing chaos with a smile etched across my innocent (ha!) face.

I feel a hand on my shoulder, I look over to Alfredo looking down at me. "Would you like me to show you to your room, Master (Y/N)?"

I hop up from the most comfortable dining chair ever. "Sure! Lead the way. And don't call me "Master", please, it makes me feel really old."

"Apologies Sir, force of habit." Alfred replied, opening the large doors for me to exit the dining area.

"Oh, Alf, you sly dog. You probably have a whole thesaurus on proper nicknames that never include the person's actual birth name, don't you? Don't worry, Alfredo, I won't tell." I zip my mouth shut and tucked the key into my pocket, I don't want to not talk forever.

'That would be a dream come true. Sadly, it will forever remain in my hopes and wishes.'

'Oh, don't be so down. You got me to talk to!'

'Is that supposed to make me feel better?'

'Is it working?'

'Do you really need to ask that?'

'No, I guess not. I just the sound of my own voice! I feel bad for the readers that they can't hear my enticing and smooth vocal cords do their 'thang!'

'You voice sound like a chipmunk having a heart attack.'

'Humph. Well, I never!'

'Aw! C'mon, guys, stop fighting. How can I be legally insane if I don't have my favorite voices to vouch for me?'

'Guys?'

'Are you there?'

'Hello?'

'Anyone?'

'Oh, screw you guys! I know you're there. You're literally inside my head, you can't go anywhere.'

*Silence*

'Ugh.'

☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂

I hope you guys enjoyed that! I'm so sorry that it took sooooo long to upload that. Writers block, ya know? But don't worry, I'm back with new ideas and part of my sanity. See you later, 'ma non-binary dudes! 

-NeatPaw 🐾