Alive Again

Chapter 13

**Josh's P.O.V**

I awoke at the sound of my doorbell ringing. Then I noticed I was alone. I guess Grace was just in the bathroom or something. I ran downstairs to answer the door. I opened my door to reveal Amanda.

I was about to say something when she pressed her lips to mine and pinned me against the door.

She started the caress my chest and then pulled away from the kiss only to kiss up the sweet spot on my neck.

I finally was able to break away.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!?" I screamed at her.

"What?" she asked," I'm not allowed to kiss my fiancé?"

"FIANCÉ?!!?" I screamed.

"W-where's G-Grace?" I just managed to spit out.

"Oh that little bitch who cheated on you? Don't worry...you got rid of her a long time ago."

I suddenly was at a graveyard. Amanda appeared behind me.

"This is what you wanted Josh." she said motioning for me to step forward.

I couldn't believe my eyes as I read the gravestone.

"R.I.P"

"Grace Ramsay"

I fell to my knees before the grave.

"You did this to me." I heard Grace's voice whisper as I touched the gravestone. I guess my head had just been playing games with me because Grace was nowhere in sight.

She married me....and I killed her.

I looked down at my hands and noticed a silver wedding band on my finger. The same wedding band that was now on Amanda's finger. I took off the ring and whipped it across the graveyard. Tears were streaming down my face.

I had murdered the love of my life?

"Here you go." Amanda said handing me a bag, snapping me out of my thoughts.

Inside of the bag was a needle full of heroin and a razor.

"What's wrong? You love this stuff! Take a look down at your arms if you don't believe me!" she laughed.

I looked down at me shaky arm, only to see needle marks and slashes across my wrists. They were fresh now, not scars.

Now I was left alone in the graveyard.

"Josh?" I heard Grace's voice.

"Grace?" I whispered.

"Josh!" I heard her voice again.

"GRACE?!?" I screamed running around the graveyard, trying to find the voice.

Suddenly I felt someone grab me from behind an-

********

"JOSH..JOSH WAKE UP!" Grace said shaking me.

I awoke shaken and sweaty. It was just a dream. I sat up and quickly examined my finger. No wedding band. Then my forearms. No new slashes or needle marks, only the old scars that will continue to haunt me forever.

"Josh..?" Grace said sitting up beside me.

I wrapped my arms tightly around her.

"Josh...can't....breathe." she gasped.

I let go of her. I guess I had been hugging her too tightly.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

I didn't respond. What was I supposed to say? I had dream that I was married to Amanda, I murdered you, and I was back to heroin and cutting?