i feel like I'm faking it, you know. that I'm not really sick, nothing's wrong with me. It terrifies me that everything is a lie. Who am I without anorexia or bulimia? That's why I don't want to change, other than I know I'll just relapse, my disorder has completely consumed my brain and it's my personality.
on another note, it's the most embarrassing thing to have anorexia and still be fat.
