melanie.
I barely breathed as we made our way up to where Gran was. And as soon as I saw her laying up in her bed I finally gasped to let in some air.
Mum was almost in full meltdown mode, I could tell.
"Oh, Mum! What's happened?" She says, on the verge of hysterics. Tears were forming in the corners of her eyes.
Mum has always had a sort of strained relationship with Gran, and Gran always said that she was born a difficult person to love. My dad could stand as evidence for that, he loved her— but he found it hard to. He worked as a builder, and in the past few years seemed to only be able to find work that was far away from home.
He came back every month or two, acting like we were one big happy family, and then he would stay a week or two and Mum would pick every argument possible, and within a few days he was up and gone again. It was almost as if Mum wanted him to go. Ever since Jake, she began to drink more, and that always sparked arguments between her and Dad.
"I've only had a stroke, don't worry Rita." She tries to reassure Mum.
But Auntie Jane calls me away from the bed and looks at me with serious eyes.
"She's not in great shape, the doctors are quite worried. She isn't able to look after herself anymore, they say. But she didn't tell us she was struggling so much so it's gotten to a point where she's only gone and made herself worse. You're old enough to know this stuff now, I think."
I don't even know what to say. I just nod to show I have understood what has been said. Funny how when I need the words to come, they don't.
When we come back to her bedside, she is holding Chloe's hand and talking to her.
"Oh Chloe, darling. You've gotten bigger again. You look so much older now, with that gorgeous hair and gorgeous face!" She gushes.
Chloe starts to talk about how school has been going, telling Gran ally he teachers are picking on her, when it's definitely just her being a brat and teachers becoming frustrated. She loves to play the victim. Gran says that's she'll sort them out for her and they laugh.
I see Mum and Jane talking a little bit away down the corridor, I can only presume about Gran and her condition.
"And my lovely Melanie, how are you?" She gives me a weak little smile and I feel like I could start sobbing. I didn't want her to be so ill. But she was and there was nothing I could do, so I just smiled back and said something sweet to keep her happy.
"I've been good Gran. Same as always."
"Keeping up your maths I hope?" She questions, she used to adore watching me do the Sudoku in the newspaper when I was younger, and was convinced I was a genius for being able to do them. I think that might be where my love for maths sprouted, but I can't be certain. I knew I loved being told I was good at something, considering I was terrible at everything else. Mum would just scream at me all the time for causing trouble, and I lot of the time I didn't even know I was. It seemed that trouble always just found me and I didn't know how.
"Of course." I say, and she smiled a little bigger. Gran always tried to be gentle and kind with Chloe and I, and tell us Mum was just in a bad mood, but her bad mood has been going on every day since 2005, so I'm certain it's just her personality now.
"She's been teaching delinquents maths." Chloe scoffs. "Home tutoring for some of them and everything."
I wanted to slap her, Gran's eyes lit up. She loved a bit of gossip.
"Is she teaching you then?" Gran jokes and Chloe looks so offended I had to let out a laugh. Chloe likes to make Gran think she's an angel, but Gran can see right through it. She only entertains it for a laugh and has a right little giggle to herself about Chloe's stories.
"Only for her boyfriend though." Chloe shoots me a smug, evil look and I know I go a shade of bright red because I can feel heat rush to my cheeks.
"A boyfriend? Who is he then?" Gran tugs my hand playfully.
"His name is Van."
I shake my head. "Not my boyfriend. Not even my friend." I say, trying to deny it. I felt so embarrassed.
"Ahhh sure." Gran laughs. "What's his name then Chloe? What's he like?"
"His names Van. And he's decent, Mel's doing well for herself." Chloe says, knowing it'll make me go back into a bright tomato colour.
"Van? Like a white Van? Who names their child that?!" She exclaims.
"Not his real name Gran." I say, trying to salvage him, for what reason, I'm not sure. I felt a sting in my heart when it felt like she was judging him. And I didn't like that feeling I felt for him.
"What's his real name then? Don't tell me it's worst than that! Does he beep to you to say hello?!" She jokes.
"His names Ryan." Chloe butts in before I can even tell her.
I shoot her daggers. "Jealous, are we?" She sneers. "I know your boyfriend too." She tries to taunt me.
"And I know yours." I say. "Gran!" I chirp, turning to her. "Would you like to hear about Chloe's boyfriend?" I say.
Gran is giddy with excitement as she nods her head.
As much as I don't want to call Benji Chloe's boyfriend as the thought of it makes my stomach turn, I want to make her an embarrassed as I am. So I decide to lay it on thick and tell Gran all about Chloe's antics with Benji, and watch her turn the same red colour as I tell her about how I saw them kissing like two vacuum cleaners.
I'm getting so caught up that I forget the situation I'm in, and the huge mess that I currently have the pleasure of calling my life.
