Toradora: The Next Step

Chapter 15: Pitiful Regret

At the table once again was Taiga, Ryuuji and Yasuko.  This time there wasn't as much tension filling the air.

"I've decided I will give one chance to my Dad."  Ryuuji spoke with a confident tone.  As an immediate reaction, Yasuko opened her eyes wide and gasped.

"Are you sure you want to do that?"  She argued.

"Yes, I've thought about it thoroughly."  Ryuuji replied reassuringly.  He took a moment to see the obvious worry that her face displayed.  "Don't worry about it.  I'm practically an adult now, right?"

"I-I know!  But..."  Yasuko stuttered as she averted her gaze and took a pause.  "Ah...  You've grown up so fast, Ryuuji."  She smiles as she reverts her gaze to him.  "Alright.  I'll respect your decision."

Ryuuji and Taiga smiled at Yasuko's words.

"Unfortunately, I don't have any way of contacting him.  However, he could still be nearby so it could be worth having a search."  Yasuko explained.

"I didn't expect you to still have contact with him."  Ryuuji spoke as he shook his head.  "I'll get going now."  As he got on his feet, he looked down to the tiger who was also getting onto her feet.  "You coming too?"  She nodded enthusiastically.

~

Ryuuji and Taiga walked down several streets with no luck at finding who they were searching for.  Ryuuji was considering what he would say to his dad when they finally meet to have a conversation.  What does he want to get off of his chest?  What does he want to know?  He suddenly noticed that Taiga wasn't walking beside him and he stopped in his tracks, desperately looking around for her.

Ryuuji let out a sigh of relief when he saw her a few paces behind him, staring intensely at a doughnut stand whilst drooling.  He stood next to her, sighing again as he proceeds to buy her a doughnut.

After Taiga devoured the doughnut, she had countless crumbs around her mouth.  Ryuuji grins as he observes this.

"W-What?!"  She mumbled, narrowing her eyes.  Instead of saying anything, Ryuuji raised his hand which had a tissue in it and wiped her face.

"Somehow, I just knew you'd make a mess of eating that."  He laughed.

"How very caring of you, Ryuuji."  A familiar voice interrupted.

Ryuuji rapidly turned his head towards the source of the voice.

"Dad...?"

His dad nodded in reply.

~

Inside a cafe, at a table by a window, Ryuuji and Taiga sat opposite to Ryuuji's dad.  Three half empty glasses sat idle on the table.  Their thoughts were drowned out by the constant chattering of people throughout the cafe.

The first to speak was Ryuuji's dad.

"You see, back then I just wasn't prepared to raise a child.  I was a coward who was afraid of the consequences I would have to face since Yasuko and I were both young.  As I grew up, I became more regretful towards my decision and it lead to me being unable to settle with anyone or anything I was doing.  The regret kept eating away at me.  But now...  Now that I have a stable income and a peaceful life, I worked up the courage to try to take responsibility and become part of your life."

There was a pause where Ryuuji tried to digest everything that his dad was saying.

"I get it... just a bit.  But you know, just walking back into my life out of nowhere isn't taking responsibility.  You can't make up for the years you've been gone."

"I'm aware, Ryuuji.  I promise to do whatever I can from now on for you so-"

"No, Dad, you don't understand!"  Ryuuji snapped.  "You can't just come back and say you've changed your mind.  You should've thought about the consequences back then!"  Ryuuji got to his feet.  "Yasuko's had to go through so much stress because of you.  She had to raise a child all by herself while she was at such a young age.  You ran away from your responsibility and had a life without the difficulties she's had to go through!"  After he noticed a few gazes pinpointed on him from the nearby tables in the cafe he sat down again and cleared his throat.

"I know, and I'm sorry.  But I did go through difficulties too because of my regret..."

Ryuuji's eyes lit up like a fire and he clenched his teeth.

"You don't have the right to complain.  Are we meant to pity you and your regret when we've been through so much because of you?"  He spat, holding back his rage.  His fists were tight as they rested on the table that it looked like his fingers could break.

Hit with the truth, Ryuuji's dad looks down with his eyes narrowed and mouth tightly shut.

Taiga, who had spectated the conversation so far, began to think to herself.  "I can't say anything... What happens is for Ryuuji to decide, and I shouldn't interfere with that.  But... I said I'd support him.  What can I do to support him right now?  If I can't say anything then I... I can remind him that I'm here for him."

She gently grabs Ryuuji's nearest fist and pulls it with her hand to rest on the chair.  His fist turns into an open palm and she keeps her hand on top of his.  His face slowly returned to it's normal expression.

After a few moments of reflection, Ryuuji's dad starts to talk again.

"I see.  You're right.  I don't have the right to complain.  For what it's worth, I'm sorry.  You won't see me again."  When his voice stopped, he immediately got to his feet and put down some money on the table to pay for the drinks, before walking out of the cafe without looking back.

"That damn old man.  He really isn't worth giving a chance is he?  He came here out of nowhere and then gives up so easily.  He's not worth it."  Ryuuji murmured, whilst still looking towards the chair where his dad was just sat.

"If that's what you've decided, I'll support that decision."  Taiga whispered with a faint smile.

Behind Taiga's smile was some different inner thoughts.  "But, just as Ryuuji once tried to help me get along with my Dad...  Maybe I should try the same."