You the one that left
You the selfish one
You the taker of happy nights and charity of dark days
You ...
Left your records in my attic
Theyre all happy songs that you left behind so why am i not happy
You are depressed
You made me depressed
You made me sick
You twisted the connection to love in my neurons till it snaped
You took my ability to give
You...
Dint even realise what you did, the way you did it , what it caused
You destroyer of dreams
You keeper of hair locks
You gift bringer
You penny giver
You...
Think that can make up for this, the gifts at Christmas the five gold coins a week
Supprisingly chocolate will not solve all a six year olds problems but you made sure of that
You made sure that i would never give parts of me away because you knew how easy it was to give them to tye wrong person
I know u felt you couldn't stay
I know she hurt you in all kinds of ways
I havent seen the scars but I know they are there
You could have protected me
And you know it
But instead you chose yout happyness over mine and my sisters futures
For brain functionality
You knew we would be hurt if you left and you did it anyway
Why ?
And don't give that crap that you had to and you had no choice
Because you did theres always a choice
Hense you chose to get out of bed this morning
Which shows you are capable of making a decision that you didn't want to
So why was that time any different
Why did you think Christmas morning was the best time to tell us you were going
Why did you lie
Why did you say you might come back
Why did you give me hope only to slowly crush it in the palm of your hands over the next seven years
Why will you not admit this is your fault
Because it is your fault and you know it deep down
Further in than the blade in my skin you made me put there
You made me think I wasn't good enough for you to stay
So in my mind i will never be good enough for anyone to stay
If only you had stayed
There'd be no scars on my heart my inner thigh or childhood memories
I would be able to give parts of me away because I wouldn't have known how it felt to lose so much of me
How it felt to be left in the firing line
when you bullet proof vest runs away
because it was too scared to do its fucking job
YOU ARE READING
Road to nowhere
Poetrythis is a poetry book written through the stages of a teenage girls depression and what feels like a long road to the end that she doesn't want to be on for long. It is truly only a look into the mind of a depressed teen and the rollercoaster that i...
