Lost

Fallen Empire

A dead thing should stay dead.
Things of the past should remain in the past.
And Something buried should stay that way.
No good can come of
Unearthing relics long forgotten.
But I knew that once we locked eyes again
That's exactly what would happen.
These feelings,
Relics of a civilization long outgrown,
Were buried under an avalanche of reality.
The earth split herself open
And swallowed them down her throat.
Laid to rest in the bowels of her being
Like any good fallen empire.
Covered in dust and brick and mortar,
These feelings became ruins that I sometimes visit and explore for the sake of remembrance.
And For months, I did just that.
I would think of you,
Daydream of a world where something could've happened.
Dream of a possibility of success.
I would visit the ruins of that empire
And use what I saw to fuel my writing.
I would open myself up
And spill to page my most inner thoughts and my deepest desires.
I would describe the architecture
And every curve and angle of every building.
I would describe the ivy that seemed to defy gravity as it crawled its way to the top of everything.
I would describe the culture
And every god that blessed the land.
Eventually, the remains of a time long gone were too far buried for me to reach.
I no longer tried to visit anymore
Nor did I want to.
I was content to leave everything suppressed,
Covered in moss and unable to be found even if you had exact coordinates.
I thought.
Now I feel as though these ruins have been disturbed.
This grave site dug up and looted.
Things I thought long ago buried and dismissed
Have been unearthed by you.
Antiquities of a forgotten time
Given new life and sustenance.
Rome wasn't built in a day,
But it burned in one.
These feelings took months to push down far enough to handle,
But they were pulled back out and ripped open in the time it took to spot you through a window.
These feelings have been reborn,
And it always seems that things like this come back with a vengeance,
As if angry to be forced out and put aside,
Even if for the good of body and mind.
And I was right in my sentiments that buried things should stay that way,
Because where once I had reached a point where you were more or less a fleeting thought,
Now you once again dominate my psyche.
You enter my mind and refuse to leave.
And i know you have to be some sort of magic or phenomenon
Because never has an empire digested by Mother Earth
Come back full force and reclaimed its territory so completely.
Never had anyone had this much control over my mind and my heart.
Never have I wanted to lock feelings away more than I do now.
Never have I been so unable to.