But She's Darkskin ||Completed || BEING EDITED

Darkskin: Chapter Thirty-Three

I feel like I'm fifteen all over again, I haven't put a blade to my skin in over ten years and the fact that I'm doing it is blowing me. I let this one guy take over my entire life because I sat there and believed he could be the one to be there for me at all times. I feel like the dumb school girl I used to be, falling for this asshole like he was my knight and shinning armor. If I could go back and take it back I probably would but then again I probably wouldn't have made it this far in my life without his dumb ass. "You're running away from your problems again." I heard the soft voice of Tiff from the other side of the bathroom door. My tears picked up again and I let them fall down my cheeks, I watched the blood fall t the floor and it just bought back memories. I shouldn't be doing this but it just feels like all the worries are dropping from my body.

Couple hours went by, I decided to take a really quick shower and then clean up the mess I made inside the bathroom. Once I got out the bathroom finally, the kids were knocked out in the bed with Tiff. Carly had Rach because Tiff wanted to comfort me and make sure the boys were cool before we left in the morning. I'm moving away to Philadelphia, only because my cousin owns a hair shop down there, and she's been begging me for three years to move there so I can become part owner. I've done hair a lot I mean shit I do my own hair, but professionally I've never done it. So I'm going to move there, go to school and then I'll be signing some papers to become half owner. I can finally live my life the way I want too without him pulling me back.

I would let him see his kids but honestly he's shown me he could careless for the kids we've made. How you ditch your own sons for another child? What type of father is that? I want to forget about everything we had but I have two kids by him already so.... I'm contemplating about getting in that car tomorrow morning, I want to go but then again I feel like it's something I shouldn't do. Do I really want to walk away from this life? Do I really want to forget about him and everything we had... If I stay I'm stupid, If I leave I'm stupid. Lose/Lose situation here.

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"You're going to do great, Just call me whenever you may need me my love." Carly told me wiping the tears that fell from my eyes. I nodded my head hugging her tightly in my arms.

"I'm going to miss you." I mumbled into her neck letting the tears trickle down my cheeks. I heard her sniffling then she chuckled softly pulling away from the hug.

"I'll miss you even more, and my nephews, but you're going out here to better your life. I want you to be you and just live the way you want too." She told me and I nodded my head in agreement with what she said.

It took me about another 30 minutes to finish saying bye to the girls and the kids. I put Kas and Ashton into the car with me, we got comfortable in the car we had a driver for. So glad I took the money Aaron gave me for clothes and saved that shit up for something useful. I can now go down here , buy me a small little house, get me a car, job and go right to school so I can get the rest of my life planned out. Some may say it's too late and no guy is going to even glance at a girl with hella baggage, and two kids from their last relationship but aye you never know what may happen.

"Mommy are we going far away?" Ashton asked me glancing out the car window.

"Yes baby, we're going far away." I smiled a little , still with too much on my mind.

Aaron

She got every right to be mad at me but one thing she don't got the right to do is just take my kids. I heard she left a couple days ago and sadly she didn't even tell her own brother where she was going. I mean she's pissed off right now so I'd think she'd be back but to be quite honest after what I did I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't come back, ever. I fucked up way worst than I did before, I let my little emotions take control and I went out doing shit that really made me loose her for real this time.

"You fucked up and now because of YOU! I don't know where my sister is! Thanks a lot!" Elijah yelled in my face.

"You can't fucking get mad at me because she up and left without a trace. I didn't tell her fucking ass to leave so don't be coming at me." I yelled back pacing back and forth across the living room floor. I heard a chuckle come from Elijah, I stopped turning to him. He was shaking his head giving me an evil eye.

"The crazy thing is, you're acting like you weren't living a double life and doing what you wanted. Telling your girl you was going down Nola to work, when in reality, I went down there to work. You tagged along so you could spend more time with Keyonna and her kid. Yeah I kissed a girl, Carly knows but I wasn't living a separate life because MY FUCKING GIRL WOULDN'T HAVE ANOTHER KID AND HAVE SEX WITH ME. I swear if I didn't have a family to think about I'd kill your ass where you stand right now, Sadly I wish we were never friends. I spent my entire life making sure she was okay and majority of it was because you were the fuck up she kept coming back too. You're suppose to be my best friend but once family is involved it's a whole different story. Another thing is, when she find out our dad might died she might revert back to cutting herself, maybe thinking suicide again. Only so much can happen to Ashley before she decides to actually kill herself. I know the main thing on her mind is her kids but man.. you have to think about the things she used to do. The girl was once suicidal in her life time. We're not friends anymore , have fun with your new family because ever since that bitch came into the picture.. She's the only one that mattered anyways."

He left out the door after he said that not allowing me to say one word. The words he said cut deep because Id never think I would heard my "best friend" say that shit to me. I understand where he's coming from though but damn... I guess shit's really going to be changed from now on.. Might as well gone on and leave..