We left for Hannah's not long after. Laura came as she was friends with Sage. I could hear the band playing from outside. I knew that it was the local band Skelter. The music scene is big but tight around here and so a lot of the musicians knew each other. I was in classes with the guitarist, Sid and the drummer, Lawrence. Deryk and Kyle I knew but not as well. We found the others at a table upstairs. Mark and Clive were playing pool while the others chatted over pints of beer.
"Hey!" Mark said when he saw us.
"Hi guys" Tord said, I smiled at them all. Mark nudged Clive.
"It's your round" Clive sighed but gave me his pool cue and went down to the bar. Laura went and sat with Sage and Tord followed and patted Damien on the shoulder before sitting down next to him.
"How you getting on?" Mark asked me.
"I'm good.. Why you asking?"
"It's not a secret that you're going downhill, Dan" I looked at him.
"What do you mean?"
"Laura seems to think you have PTSD" He told me quietly.
"Well I don't" I told him, putting a ball.
"It'd be understandable. You've found your best friend attempting suicide twice-"
"Alright Mark. Leave it" I told him, putting the cue down on the table and walking to sit with the others.After that one pint that Clive brought, I didn't drink anything else. I sat quietly, thinking about what it would be like if Murph was here. He'd probably be making a fool of himself by dancing to Skelter with 5 pints inside of him. I got up.
"You good Dan?" Amy asked.
"Just going to the toilet" I smiled at her before heading downstairs. As I pushed open the door to the men's toilet, I could hear someone throwing up and I froze. He was slumped against the bath, dried vomit around his mouth. All of the pills from the cabinet were on the floor. He'd found my pain meds for my back and he also added his citalopram to his mix. All of the packets were empty. I staggered backwards, walking straight into a man behind me.
"You good buddy?" The guy said, holding my shoulders to stop me from falling over.
"Y-yeah" I stuttered, walking forward again and going to one of the cubicles. The smell of vomit was intense. The guy who followed me in was comforting the guy who was throwing up. I pissed as quick as I could, washed my hands and went back upstairs to grab my jacket. The others looked at me, still engaged in conversation among themselves. I grabbed my jacket.
"You off?" Clive asked. I nodded. Tord went to get up but I put my hand out.
"Stay, I'll be okay" I told him.
YOU ARE READING
Too lost for therapy - The Wombats
Teen Fiction"He's gonna bring you down, Dan. I'm not gonna sugar-coat it, he's just gonna hold you back." TRIGGERS: This story contain strong mentions of suicide, self harm, PTSD and other mental illnesses throughout. Readers digression is advised.