Paramore Conspiracy Theories (Book 2)

Things Paramore Should Do

Hi, hey, hi

So I always come up with Merch ideas and shit for Paramore and I guess I wanna share them with all of you. No one asked for this, Harley. 

1. Paramore Should Collaborate With Vans or Converse 

(The Fake Happy shoes above were designed by me, not actually for sale anywhere)

Seriously, like this just makes the most sense to me. Personally I've never seen Paramore as high fashion icons, to me they've always been some normal kids who happened to score a record deal. Collaborating with Urban Outfitters and UNIF is cool but it never felt on brand to me personally, because I've always looked at them as average normal people not the type to wear designer stuff which is part of what makes them so down to earth and easy to connect with. They were 5 average kids from the suburbs just like you and me, that was their whole appeal.

 Not to mention collaborations with brands like that are very expensive for the fans who want to buy the limited edition merch and support them. Spending a ton of money on a t shirt feels kind of dumb in my opinion, as oppose to a pair of shoes which usually last longer and are easier to clean if you treat them with care. I propose they do this collaboration and make a pair of vans for each single on AL, so 5 different pairs to choose from. 

2. Parahoy Should Be A Music Festival Not A Cruise

Now more than ever after the sexual assault allegations that happened and the past that's been exposed with Norwegian Cruise Lines and getting sued multiple times, I feel like the cruise idea should be put to bed. Personally, like I said in the past, the first parahoy seemed fun, the second seemed okay, and obviously the 3rd was not because of the allegations. The quality of Parahoy has gone down the longer it's gone on anyways, with rising prices, less prominent acts performing, and less activities offered. The idea was fun, and was something no one had ever done before, but I think it's run its course. I think they should stop working with Norwegian immediately and scrap the cruise and just do a regular festival instead. Not only would it probably be easier, and cheaper, but more people would be able to come since you won't have the capacity issue cruise ships have. They could hold the festival in South Florida or maybe California and have it by the beach so they could still have the nautical theme and still call it Parahoy. They could set it up kind of like a Warped Tour date, with multiple stages, concession stands, and merch stands, and even offer meet and greets if they want. They can still hold the festival over a couple days and do activities with the fans if they want too. 

3. Paramore Should Simplify Their Stage Production

(The Orange and yellow tape mic #neverforget)

I don't know if you guys know this, but the more complicated the lighting and everything on stage is for a singer, the more expensive the tickets are, because the artist has to pay for all the extra production and they make their money back on ticket sales. I'm not alone in thinking this, Jon from ARTV even made a video on it and mentioned Paramore (https://youtu.be/O1tP2RECIu4). They're new rig with all the lasers and screens seems unnecessary to me, and of course really expensive which drives up prices for concert goers. If they got rid of the 5 huge screens and all the lasers and simplified things tickets would be a lot cheaper. I've also heard that they're really having trouble selling out shows this tour, which they didn't really have in the past, and I'm not surprised because I'm sure a lot of people don't wanna pay a price two times higher than the last time they saw Paramore, me included.

This is a picture of my ticket from when I saw Paramore 4 years ago at Monumentour. I was in section LTC4 (Left Center 4) in row U, which was 22 rows out from the stage, the ticket cost $64.50. A ticket in that same section at that same venue will now cost twice as much

A ticket in section LTC4 for Tour 5 costs $139 dollars now, twice as much as it did last time I saw Paramore. That doesn't make me wanna go see them, that's way too high of a price to be that far away from the stage. And before anyone tries to pull a Nancy Drew on me, yes you can find these tickets for $85 on TicketMaster, but then TicketMaster sticks on a $25 fee and $5 shipping fee, which would make the ticket $115 total which is cheaper but still almost twice the price. Paramore would benefit from cutting production costs and therefore cutting ticket prices, as it would probably help them sell out all those places that aren't selling.

Is there any ideas you have for Paramore? Tell me in the comments, I'm actually really interested to hear them. Thanks for reading. - H