napkin notes || lashton hemwin

01

if you update from mobile it doesn't give you the opportunity for bolding or italics sighhh.

Hiii just a reminder that if you ever feel unimportant then please please please try to think of one good thing about yourself a day because a lot of people love you especially me and it may not feel like it sometimes but people do and I hope you get better soon. X

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Luke

He wanted so desperately for someone's touch, someones hug, someone's hand to touch his face and wipe away the tears from the countless overly dramatic movies he had watched that weekend. He didn't want to text someone first, he didn't want to be whiny and needy but he was needy and he wanted something. There were names in the back of his head going back and forth, Seth, Michael, Josh, Calum, who should he call. Luke automatically forgot about Josh because Josh still had yet to find out Luke was gay. Seth was in town though, Michael wasn't, Calum was farther away. On most occasions Calum would give up anything to be with Luke, but would he now?

Luke knew there was no point in calling any of his family, it wasn't because they didn't accept him for who he was but for the reason of them not acting the same after they knew he was gay. How cliché does one family have to be? He started thinking more about how he had no one to love.

It was normal for Luke to think about how he could be such a great boyfriend if he actually had someone to talk to. Luke told himself he had no friends, it was stupid because he wasn't depressed and he definitely had it better than ninety-nine percent of people. It was just that Luke longed to touch someone, he longed for kisses, hugs. He wanted a kiss where you could laugh in the middle of it and end up clanking your teeth together, he wanted a hug where someone's tears could stain the chest of his shirt, he wanted love in all of its good and in all of its bad. He wanted happiness with someone else.

After filling his coffee cup up once again he walked back to the couch and sat down pressing play where he had left the movie paused. Luke adjusted his position to where the cup was stuck in between his knees and he leaned forward, keeping his eyes on the screen, reaching for his phone. The coffee cup preceded to fall and spill on the floor. This angered him as he was already upset to begin with, he put his sock covered feet on the ground where they soaked in the coffee. He took a deep breath and peeled off his socks setting them on the floor next to the spill and set his feet down in the hot coffee, once again, he regretted it. Luke ran his hand through his hair at once gripping the ends excessively. Bending down he picked up the mug and threw in down on the wood floor. He took a seat and let his feet settle in the coffee again.

Not too long after he paused the movie in realization that his mother would be pissed for leaving the liquid to stain to floor. Luke stood up and dropped his jacket to the floor letting it mop the puddle. His wet feet left foot prints on the floor and began sticking to the wood. The glass was at his feet and he bent down quickly, too quickly. Within a few seconds Luke was faced with slamming his hands down on shards of the ceramic mug to catch himself. He winced and yelled in pain, he tried to get up multiple times and eventually did but his hands were puddling and pulsating. Luke grabbed his phone coating sections with small spots of blood just to dial Calum's number.

"Hello?" Calum answered.

"Are you close?" The phone was slipping out of Luke's hands from not only the small amount of blood but also from the sweat in his palms. They were cut in so many spots and the blood was pooling very slowly in his hands.

"Yes?"

"Come, hurry. Please."

"Oh, okay."

Calling Calum was Luke's last choice, he didn't want to but he did. He did because his hands were throbbing, he did because he tried to remove the glass himself but the big pieces began bleeding more. He did because he wanted someone's touch and within minutes Calum's arms were around him and allowed Luke to breathe again.

Ashton

He colored in the open letters with the sharp tip of his mechanical pencil during each class, each day because he didn't want to seem cocky but he really did know ninety-nine percent of the stuff that was taught. He wasn't failing, surprisingly enough, that was something he hoped his mother could be proud of. He couldn't draw, so he read, he read a lot. Not for escapes, not for fantasies but to look like he was doing something. In Ashton's head he didn't think of himself as a person, he thought of other people as people. Ashton just had yet to meet the right person that could make Ashton feel alive. At the moment the only thing reminding Ashton of him being alive was heat and pain. Words meant nothing because there were no good ones thrown to him. Words meant nothing because he was only used to the ones that hurt him. So therefore, words reminded him he was alive, but Ashton didn't want to be alive.

Ashton began slowly pulling his bottom lip into the grasp of his teeth where he could bite something, pull something, know he was in control of something. You see, Ashton didn't look "emo", he had short brown boots and a closet full of skinny jeans and plain t-shirts. Not all black, not all color either. His hair wasn't long, it wasn't short, it wasn't out of control but it was dirty, very dirty. His eyes were tired and distracted, always looking for something to avoid to gaze of others.

All of the words on Ashton's page were covered, he had nothing to do and sadly it had only passed fifteen minutes of class. He flipped it over checking the other side for word but a clean white sided paper waved to him. Now Ashton pulled out a book, one that he got yesterday and wasn't interested in in the least bit, but he pulled it out for comfort. The first page began to bore him and he turned it over, the second page did the same. When he had reached the fifth page he had no idea what he had read, and even worse, he had been caught. The teacher stood over his desk and clicked their pen in and out.

"Care to explain why your entire page is covered in filled in letters and not notes?"

"I'm sorry."

"Oh, okay."

"Okay."

The teacher began walking away, "but Mr. Irwin, care to explain it to the class?"

Ashton closed his book and closed his hands together between his knees as the entire class turned their head toward him. "I was lost and didn't know what the lesson was about so I just colored in the letters."

"Louder, Mr. Irwin."

"I just didn't understand, sir." Ashton spoke up and his face automatically reddened.

"Oh, how horrible. Maybe you should pay attention next time."

"Yes, sir."

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Woah, ok sorry that took like half a year to update. So hi I'm gabby and maybe I have great ideas for this story. I hope.

Hi/bye

And ur rlly cute so <33

Vote and comment please??
Updated: 6/15/15