napkin notes || lashton hemwin

02

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I apologize ahead of time, this update is poop

Luke

They sat in the emergency room.

They sat waiting for the bandages to be applied to all of Luke's cuts and stitches.

They say waiting is only for the patient.

They say that not everyone can be quiet for a long period of time.

"Your thoughts are so loud. I can't hear my own," Calum commented.

Luke decided to look up but not reply.

"What are they about?" He questioned.

Luke shrugged.

"Do you want me to call Michael? He's better at talking than me."

Luke glanced at his hands and back at Calum.

"It's not your fault you know."

Luke shook his head and tapped his foot. He elbowed his friend and mumbled for the other to put his arm around him, he did, it felt warm.

"Do you need anything? Food? Water? Bathroom? Sleep? I'd need to help you use the bathroom and that would be awkward but I'd do it, I mean I have seen all of you before. You could sleep on my shoulder, I could feed you pizza, we could prank call people, we could walk around, we could do whatever you want to."

Luke leaned his head on Calum's shoulder to get his attention that the nurse was standing right in front of them, "follow me to room number twelve, please." The woman smiled at the two boys in front of her. "We need a parent to be here also, we can finish the job but we still need a parent, alright? Is there a way you can contact one?" The nurse nodded towards the boy without stitches on his hands- Calum.

"Yeah I'll call, excuse me," Calum left Luke in the room with the nurse alone.

"Hello," she left a pause waiting for the tall boy to fill in his name.

"Luke."

"Hello, Luke. I'm your nurse for this event."

"Nice to meet you, your nurse. Thanks." He looked down at his lap and smirked.

The nurse let loose a laugh, she thought he was attractive.

Luke didn't ask her name nor did he want to be there but he knew he had to stay.

"I need to ask you a series of questions, just for our records, okay? So, I need your full name."

"Luke Robert Hemmings," he laid back on the bed covered in white crinkling paper.

"Age?"

"Oh, sixteen."

She eyed his body now that he was laying down, "preferred pharmacy?"

"Don't know."

"On any medications?"

"Nope."

"Any mental or physical problems?"

"I don't think so."

"Any past or current suicidal thoughts or actions including the act of selfharm?"

"Yep," he sighed and rolled over to his side being carful to not knock his hands on the bed. His left hand had much less damage done to it.

"Scars from it?"

"Yes, yes, yes, isn't that normal? You cut, you get scars, okay? Normally I never get asked these questions, I just get that doctor stuff done."

"We're just making sure this wasn't from abuse or something self-inflicted."

"Well, it wasn't. So can I please just get these wrapped and leave?"

"Excuse me but-"

"Hey Luke, your mom will be here soon, okay?"

Luke smiled at Calum for the first time in a few days.

Calum smiled back.

"I'm just going to spray this disinfectant on your stitches and I'll wrap them up!" The nurse added and put on a fake bright smile as soon as Calum walked in, evidentially she found him more attractive.

"Sit up, bud." Calum helped to pick up Luke so he was sitting up.

Calum wrapped his arm around Luke's back and it felt good to be touched.

It felt good to be in someone's arms.

It felt right.

Luke felt right.

Luke felt safe.

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Ashton

He continued to doodle things in his notebook once he got home from school, he sketched creatures with long necks and distorted faces. He put a name to his work, the characters each had a meaning behind them, the setting was on a black space, the only thought there was. He began a thin body, the size of a popsicle stick and drew the lines of ribs and other bones making sure to pucker the cheekbones- anorexia. Though it wasn't something Ashton suffered from, it was important. The next drawing was placed next to anorexia, the long necked, evil doodle wore a grin- greed. Ashton's lips rolled together and back into his mouth, one hand holding his pencil and his other was place near the crotch of his pants while he sat at his desk. It was cold in the small room and the light was slowly fading in his house but his mom was home and he didn't feel like leaving the room. She'd been better lately, towards Ashton even though she was never horrible except for once. The last thing he put on the paper was writing, it read "I would love someone but then I'd have to look at myself" and Ashton crossed his lips with a straight line because he knew it was going to happen regardless.

"Are you going to eat anything?" He heard a voice come from the other side of his door, his mom.

He got up and opened the door, looking down towards his mother, "I might, it wasn't at the top of my list though." Ashton formed a slight blush knowing that his recently put on sweatshirt was covering a huge scar just above the waistband of his sweatpants.

"Alright, it's just getting late is all and I'm trying, Ash. I think these meetings are doing something great for me." She smiled.

"I do too, I love you. I'll be down as soon as I finish my reading, okay?" He smiled and kissed her cheek before slowly closing the door on her. He propped up a chair in front of the door to be certain it wouldn't open again. There wasn't a problem with anyone, he just felt better being completely alone.

Ashton proceeded to plug his earbuds into his phone and strip into his undershirt and sweatpants. The cool air in the room crept up his skin and he quickly jumped into bed, he refused to look at his body. Ashton was going to finish his favorite disney movie for the second time today. The Lady and The Tramp began to load on his phone again, when the download finish and the opening music play there was already a smile on his face.

It felt right.

Ashton felt right.

Ashton felt safe.

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A/N
HOWDY BABE
I KNOW THIS IS A REALLY SHXTTY UPDATE AND ITS SHORT BUT I HAVE SO MANY PLANS SO PLEASE DONT GIVE UP ON ME!!! ASHTONS PART IS REALLY SHORT AND ORIGINALLY ASHTON MASTXRBATES BUT THEN I WAS LIKE WTF IS THIS AND UGH

IF YOU HAVENT WATCHED LADY AND THE TRAMP PLS DO ITS GREAT

PLS BARE WITH ME THOUGH, IM SORRY

P.s. Aye my twitter is @illegallyl0uis

Thank you. Just incase no one told you today, you're beautiful and you're loved.
Updated: 6/15/15

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