The Day We Wore Makeup + Other 'Bad' Things | [chanbaek / baekyeol]

Polar Blue

[overhead stereo, muffled:
One Love_Bob Marley
FM Radio-98.5]

He had laid like that for a while. Head crouched between his long legs; bent and quivering. Half out of cold and half out of restrained frustration. Alone didn't really fit how he felt right now, more like betrayed. He was okay being alone. But he never expected this from his own father. He knew this was how most people reacted, but his father had never been most people. Now he was. Or pretending to be anyway.

Felt like an hour before Sehun's beat up Toyota skidded to a halt into one of the bare parking spaces out front. The silver finish needed waxing and splatters of bird poop smeared on his windshield, looking more like dried tooth paste after a few days sitting in the school parking lot. Sehun's long legs propelled his body from out of the Toyota, clad in his dad's navy joggers that reached above his ankles, clip clapping in some white sandals. The rain drizzled over his black hair, slicking it down even more than it already was from earlier in the day.

"CHANYEOOOOL?" He slapped the metal door open, yelling in his signature baritone voice. Goddamn, geez. Chanyeol waved weakly from where he laid, probably infesting his pants with a million germs from the streaked vinyl floors.

Sehun scrambled over, slipping on the wet rubber soles of his shoes and looking like Bambi with his uncoordinated legs. He placed his palms on the counter, bending his back and popping his concerned face between his arms, enclosing Chanyeol's folded body against the wall.

"CHAnYeol, are you okay?" He asked, breathing really loudly. "I-I can drive you home-"

"No." He cut in, wincing at how raw his voice sounded. "I just, uh, I can't go home. I can explain everything. But-"

"You want to get out of here, yeah?" He asked, finally lowering his voice. The other nodded and started getting up shakily, sniffing still. Sehun helped him up and hauled him back to his car like a Nascar. He totally wasn't anxious at all, not like he was actually dying to know why his best friend was crying. He never witnessed Chanyeol cry; he was always so strong, even after his mom died.

"Thanks, Sae."

"Hey,"

The two buckled themselves in as the windshield wipers whisked to keep up with the oncoming shower. Chanyeol turned his face towards Sehun's, feeling his eyes lose their puffiness. "You know, remember that time in elementary school, and the boys wouldn't stop picking on me in P.E.?"

Chanyeol smiled and leaned his head against the cloth seat, closing his eyes in memory.

"Yes, they were taller than you then."

"Pfft. Besides the point. They called me a twig."

"They call you worse now." He pointed out and Sehun glared.

"Anyway, kids had been bugging you too, because you had stopped trying after counseling. I loved you for that by the way. How you didn't care. I've always cared too much."

Chanyeol's hand found Sehun's and he held it gently.

"You're too hard on yourself."

"But anyway, I remember crying and feeling snot all over my face, and there you were; a vision. You beat that kid so bad he had to go home early and cried for his mom. I had never seen such a small kid so mad before."

"I just finished counseling at the time. I remember seeing how they were laughing at you and I was feeling so bad at the time that I wanted someone else to feel something too. It felt nice to make you happy too."

"Gee, thanks." Sehun laughed, but he kept staring at Chanyeol with worry hidden behind his blurry vision. "I don't even remember thanking you. I just thought to myself: I will always be Park Chanyeol's friend. And I will, I promise."

"Sehun," he gulped down his sobs, "I want to tell you now."

"Go ahead." He scooted, knobby knees knocking into the steering wheel, which was lowered for his mother who shared the vehicle.

"My dad asked me if I liked guys instead of girls."

"Oh."

"And I do. Like guys."

"Oh."

The car was quiet and Chanyeol couldn't even look at him anymore. He felt the kinds words boiling and bubbling to a halt.

"Huh. You're the only guy I've met who likes guys." Then he started laughing. Chanyeol sulked.

"What's so hilarious?"

"It's just- all this time, guys called us fa*s." He started wheezing, slapping his knees. His laugh was so contagious that Chanyeol laughed a little too, but more like a deflated balloon.

"So you're okay, like it doesn't make you uncomfortable?"

Sehun wiped his eyes and then stared at Chanyeol with so much sincerity that it almost made him look away.

"I would never treat you like how they treat me. Okay? So what, you uh, you don't like girls? Whatever, man. Kiss dudes. Oh my God."

"What?" Chanyeol asked, looking at Sehun freak out beside him.

"Is this why you've been so fascinated with a certain jock lately? Oh my God, is he into dudes too?"

Chanyeol could see the headlines rolling so he quickly shook his head and waved his hands frantically.

"Hell, no! He and I just get along well." He wouldn't out Baekhyun like that. Not ever. Some things belonged to other people. Chanyeol figured one's sexuality fit into that category.

"Ohh 'kay. Well, let's get out of here. I want to hear more about this new revelation from your dad."

"Great, yeah. It didn't go so well..."

The gas station became a tiny speck in the distance as Sehun kept the wheel pointed towards home, looking over occasionally at his best friend, and wondering why he hadn't noticed before.

More importantly, Sehun imagined what a relationship for Chanyeol would be like, and somehow, imagining him with Baekhyun didn't look half bad. Too bad he's your typical heterosexual jock. Typical. All of it was, including the polar blue slushees they picked up along the way.
Some things just were never meant to change.

+

short but important, no? I do love a good friendship <3