Agent Arizona: Season 16

The Shisno

"There is an unwritten rule in our universe, where the greatest changes hinge on the humblest of actions. A trick, an act of friendship, a slice of pepperoni pizza. Suddenly, all is lost. The end is nigh without Dorovell. The fates told us that the beginning of our end was an ending of its own, but their prophecy came too late. Not before the Reds and Blues have vanquished their foe. Not before their foe had activated the temporal vortex. Most critically, not before the device fulfilled its true purpose. We watched in horror, my lord, unable to prevent the calamity that follows. While Dorovell stood by them and his beloved." 

The Reds and Blues are currently trying to decide where to find a place to eat. 

"I could eat a horse!" Grif says. 

"With you, I'm worried that's not a figure of speech." Carolina shakes her head. 

"That's a figure of speech?" 

"What the heck is wrong with you?" Simmons says in disgust. 

"Whatever, are we done here? 'Cuz I got some volleyballs to spike in this freaking volcano." 

"Was that an attempt at a metaphor?" Simmons asks. 

"Yo, are we serious about grub?" Tucker inquires. "My stomach is rumbling! With all the fighting and shooting, I think we skipped a meal or three." 

"Pssh, doubt it'd be possible for Grif to go at least an hour without a Twinkie on hand." Zone scoffs. 

"Hey!" 

"There ain't no good reason to go out for chow! We still got MRE's to spare! I've got an emergency supply stuffed in Lopez for this very situation!" Sarge states. 

"You seriously keep food in Lopez?" Carolina asks shocked. 

"You don't want to know where he keeps his additional ammo..." Zone mutters. 

"Yes ma'am, right up his keister! Waaaay deep in there, next to his radioisotope nuclear generator! They always stay nice and toasty! Mm-mm." 

"Kinky." Sister says slyly. 

"Gross!" Palomo says. 

"Look guys, we could get leukemia from eating out of Lopez's butt literally anytime, but right now, we're on Earth." Grid points out. "Culinary capital of the civilized galaxy! Let's go out!" 

"Shouldn't we stick around? Deal with the cops?" Tucker suggests. 

"Maybe best to let us handle that." Dylan advises. "The UNSC still thinks you're all terrorists. I'd suggest lay low until the truth comes to light." 

"Great, so food." 

"Maybe Italian?" Grif shrugs. 

"How 'bout a blood sausage?" Sarge asks. "Or some blood pudding? Or the blood of my ADVERSARIES! You know, just to mix things up." 

"Dad...no." Zone says pinching his nose. 

"Chili's is always tight." Tucker states. 

"There's a Chili's on Chorus now, we could do that anytime." Grif scowls. 

Caboose gasps. "Oh! How 'bout Home Depot? They have the best cotton candy." 

"And now, we know where all the wall insulation went..." Carolina mutters. 

"Steaks!" Tucker exclaims. "How 'bout a big ol' rib-eye?" 

"Maybe something with a vegetarian option?" Doc suggests. 

"You don't get a vote!" Grif snaps. "You lost it when you betrayed us. Purple Judas..." 

"Hooters?" Sister asks.