Ancient Things We Hold

Chapter 16

Slow Time

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The governess had always loved Aldwyn the most. Even though the cared and treated all the Daegel children equally, it was clear in her eyes that she favoured the dark eyed boy with a gentle smile. In truth, he was well loved by everyone in Carreg Llwyd, but by none more so than Ariel.

He reciprocated. When he was born she was already four and twenty, so was well trained in looking after babies. She held him carefully and spoke softly. When he was younger, though, he still loved his mother and father as that was what he was told to do. Furthermore, he had truly adored and admired his father. Once he had wanted to be exactly like him. Now he always looked to Ariel.

When his face was still plump, his voice high and his frame small, she tried to be with him as much as possible. His presence delighted her; he was so obliging and his chatter was always so sunny. He was such a happy child. She liked seeing him with Alfred and Lysa as well; the youngest ones were always the most pleasant, she decided.

Then his voice broke. His shoulders became broad and his mood more temperamental. With these changes, she wanted to see him less and less for quite some time. It was so strange. She would look at him, then fear would cross her face and she would dart from the room. It seemed to take her an age during his adolescence for her to stop being cold.

He supposed he knew why she behaved like that for so long. His physical and emotional changes were reminders that he was growing older- that the day of his departure was coming closer. Perhaps she was trying to soften the blow. If she started distancing herself from him early, then when the time came for him to properly leave as a man, it wouldn't be so bad.

But she couldn't do it. She loved that child. He didn't deserve to be shunned just because of her own incapabilities to deal with her troubles.

When he was twenty, she was forty four. Her hair had flecks of grey and her skin had started to sag. By then, she showed her affection for him as though he were a child again. Only instead of with hugs and old stories, she now did so by telling him truths. She would do almost anything for all the Daegel children, but it had been Aldwyn she watched over most of all and hence him she advised like her own son.

She worried for him when he converted to Judaism as his family became more suspicious, for he left the castle to go to the village more and more. Whenever he had time outside of work, he worshipped in the synagogue and got to know the village and its people properly. In the meantime, his lessons continued. He barely even saw Hodaya with all that!

All of a sudden he had become a stranger in his family. He sat at the dinner table, spoke with them, received guests and performed the normal duties of the son of a Lord. However, all the while he was thinking of how he was a Jew and they had no idea. They spoke of taxes and servants and politics and harvest, all while unaware of the fact that the third eldest son of Lord Daegel had entered the covenant with willingness and adoration.

It was rather difficult justifying his new actions as well. He didn't know how to explain to his family why he would not eat the pork that had been placed in front of him at tea, or why he kept his head covered all the time now. The hardest part was explaining why he disappeared every seventh night and did not return until the following sunset.

Godric joked that he was going to a whorehouse to practice for his wedding night, but nobody took that seriously. Aldwyn disapproved of free love. Lord knew why. He was not a lady, nor a priest, nor a pauper who had no time or money for such ventures. Once his older brothers had tried to convince him to make love, but he stammered his way through the conversation until he flatly refused and turned away all blushes and bashfulness.