If you're struggling like I am
Can't we make things a little easier?
//OR//
IN WHICH...lost love comes back under the worst circumstances.
[MEAGAN LEAVEY A.U.]
[OC X MORALES]
[OC X OC]
[THIS BOOK CONTAINS MATURE THEMES, PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU...
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PROLOGUE: WASTED PAPER
"IN ALL THE WILD WORLD, THERE IS NO MORE DESPERATE A CREATURE, THAN A HUMAN BEING ON THE VERGE OF LOSING LOVE."-Atticus
-
Dear Troy,
I don't know how to start this letter. Mainly because I have no clue if you're actually getting these or if I'm just sending them to no one. But if you are getting these letters and you are reading this piece of paper, then I need you to read this next part carefully. The Air Force rejected me. And know that what I'm about to do isn't because of you. I just can't hurt anymore. I need everything to stop. And never forget that I love you, okay? I'm sorry, but-
As the paper is swiped from underneath her pen, a line of ink is left on the paper and Emma sighs, knowing she'll have to start over.
She looked up at her mother, anger, and sorrow in her eyes.
"Emma, you know I love you, but you also have to know that all of these letters to Troy? Letters he isn't answering? They're wasted paper!" She says, exhausted, as she crumples the letter into a ball and throws it into the trash can.
"It's the only way I have of even remotely communicating with him," Emma whispers as she looks back down at her desk.
"I have nothing else."
"It's been three months, you need to move on." Her mom sighs and sits on the edge of her bed.
"I can't." She shakes her head, tears falling.
"You have to! It isn't healthy to still be feeling like this!" She tries to reason with her daughter.
"How am I supposed to feel?" She yells and stands quickly to look at her mom.
"First Troy leaves. And then Amber and Jackson. And then, as if that wasn't enough, the academy rejects me because of an illness I don't even have anymore. So, please tell me, mom, how am I supposed to feel? Is everything supposed to be sunshine and rainbows? Am I supposed to be with someone new? Am I supposed to find new best friends? Am I supposed to be okay with giving up the only dream I've had since I was six years old? Because I can't do that!" She continues yelling as hot, angry tears run down her red cheeks.
Her mom simply sighs before getting up and leaving the room.
Emma eyes the bottle of sleeping pills on her dresser.
It's what her letter had been about.
She needed all this damn pain to stop.
But the longer she stared at the bottle and the framed picture beside it, the more her mind shifted.
She couldn't do it.
It would destroy her family.
Her dog, Fury, rubbed against her leg at that exact same moment.
And that's when all the seemingly broken pieces started to fit together.
She needed a way to keep her mind off of him.
She needed some way to get out of the house.
And like any sane person, she didn't want to leave her dog.
So, that brings us to now.
Where a slightly older and much more mature Emma isn't exactly living the dream but also isn't completely unhappy.
